I(24F) always wanted to be an actress, thanks to my mom and her obsession with movies and tv shows. It took some time for me to figure out that it’s not as easy as I initially thought it would be. Especially giving auditions while working full time. There have been times when I went to give an audition,wait for hours and return back.
Recently I met with this lady who has been working on her own project. I requested her to consider me if there was any role that I would fit in. After a week, we had a meeting and she took an audition. She gave me the screenplay and it’s a decent one. The only problem is that there were a few scenes where I will be naked. They were strategic in a way that I won’t be shown completely naked and my privates will be covered. My mom read the script as well and agreed that this is a good project to show my intent towards acting which might help me in the longer run.
We started shooting the film. Almost after a week I took my mom with me thinking she would enjoy watching the filmmaking process. The other actor who has scenes with me on that day had some family emergency and bailed on us. The director suggested that if I’m okay with it, we can proceed with the filming of those nude scenes. She told that as we don’t have a intimacy cordinator and my mom was there on the set, she can be my moral support for the day. I should have said no right away. but, I asked my mom and she agreed.
We limit the cast to four people including my mom and these scenes were set on a beach. So we went to a closest private beach and as we already paid and took permission for three days, they agreed to move it forward. As it was kind of impromptu, we tried if we can cover up with skin color stockings but it was clear on camera. So, we went with shooting the scene completely naked. Even though the final edit would be kind of artsy, the making was pretty lewd at times. We had an intruder in between and thankfully they helped me to cover up quickly.
When we came back in the evening, My mom got strongly effected by this and said that I should drop from the project. She also told that being naked on beach is not "real" acting. We had a big fight and now she’s not talking to me and visibility sad. We are pretty close as dad was never in the picture and it pains my heart to see her like this. Even though there is no signed contract, I really can’t back off as the director was producing the project herself and if I back off now it’s going to be a loss for her with the week of shooting that was already done. On top of it, I approached her for the role and not the other way around.
So, AITA for strictly saying to my mom that I need to complete the project due to the verbal commitment I gave to the director?
NTA. Aside from contracts and your mum’s feelings, are YOU comfortable with it? That’s the only answer you need I think.
Not going to tell you Yes or No but verbal agreements hold up only in certain things done, and not all states,for your own rights to be protected written is best, as you quit your photo shoots they will have all rights too, changing to complete naked by editing, nothing you can say or do. Research but you’re a big girl.
NTA
But the director/filmmaker is.
I’m a former actor, I have done nude work. This is NOT the way it’s done. Sounds like a complete shit-show, to be honest. There is supposed to be clarity up front about what will be required (actually, a lot of these details need to be in your contract), you can’t just change shit on the fly like this.
I share your mother’s concerns that this production doesn’t sound like something that will advance your career, and that the production sounds unprofessional.
” Even though there is no signed contract, I really can’t back off as the director was producing the project herself and if I back off now it’s going to be a loss for her with the week of shooting that was already done.”
This is known as – “her problem”. No contract, no obligation. That said, she does own the footage she took of you, so be prepared she’s still going to use it.
Protect yourself better in future, please, and don’t agree to nudity on such unclear terms.
A verbal contract is only as good as the paper it’s written on…
OP, remember to get things in writing going forward.
As someone in the industry, crew rather than cast, so many red flags here in production.
Indie or not, there’s a reason why intimacy co-ordinators are seen as necessary for any scene which may contain nudity- not just nsfw scenes.
I feel if you back out now not only would it be against your word but you’d be going back to nothing and even worse now you have a black mark. If you already have the nude scenes out of the way what’s the deal? I understand where your mom is coming from but this is your career on the line. Hopefully you’re being paid though.
Also NTA
NTA.
If you are comfortable with it then its okay. It is your choice, assuming youre an adult. Your mom can be supportive of that or not.
(Verbal agreement is kind of iffy/shady when it comes down to legal stuff if ever that comes into play in the future)
Soft NTA
Having your first acting gig be around a nude/lewd scene is definitely…not setting a good tone for the rest of whatever career you plan to have. Not having an intimacy coordinator on set isn’t wildly unusual for a lower budget indie film but it’s definitely a red flag. Part of what an intimacy coordinator does is protect you. The “no signed contract” part is also a hard yikes.
It’s worth talking to your mother and asking if she feels there was anything about the set up that worried her. Does she feel like you were being taken advantage of? Does she feel like you may have been unsafe? Does she feel like the producer is untrustworthy? Basically, do her concerns stem from her worrying about your safety or was she just not emotionally ready for her daughter to be in a scene involving nudity?
If she’s worried about your safety, that’s a normal mom thing to do plus the circumstances don’t look great – no contract, your first acting gig, you’re fairly young, and nude/lewd scenes with no one there but your mother to help you.
She could have chosen a better way to express it but people often don’t express themselves well.
I guess while reading the screenplay she had something in her mind. But, watching the filming and me being naked on set kinda messed with her.
she is trying to protect you from being taken advantage off, i know you are an adult but you are also young, niave and easy to manipulate. jsut cause its a woman directing doesnt mean you are not being exploited and groomed into something/situation/group with bad intentions. acting is notorious for it. think about your situation from your mothers point and view and think as honestly as you can and if you trully believe this role with further your career do it but if you think there is a bit of trusth to you mothers point of view walk away
NTA but this sounds suspicious as hell.
No signed agreement means no pay. Are you seriously going to act nude in a soft core porno for free? This will not help you get actual acting jobs, in fact, working nude in your first “movie” will simply set you up to be taken advantage of in future soft core pornos. You are not responsible for the directors lack of money, time, scheduling or lack of professionalism. Leave now, never go back. Then read up in what real, professional sets are like. What you described is some back alley B movie straight to streaming crap that will only cause you issues later in life when your future husband, job or friends find out you worked in that nasty movie.
Sorry but you got screwed over.
The actor didn’t bail that day, it was a bait and switch. They only ever intended on shooting the nude scenes that day and there was never going to be an intimacy co ordinator.
They set up up like this so they could get away with a shitshow of a set up and pushed it on you in a way that it becomes your fault if the nude scenes didn’t get filmed that day as “it would have been a waste of a filming day” if you didn’t agree.
You should listen to you mom.