Context: my son and I went out yesterday to the shop, combining it with an afternoon walk. We bought all the cards we needed but I decided I didn’t want to lug two bouquets (one for the wife, one for my own mum) around the neighbourhood. So I went back later to get them. Today the wife is upset that a) I didn’t get him to pick them and b) they’re apparently the same flowers I got her last year. Sigh.
NTA but next year have your son gift something other than flowers, something he picks out.
YTA, you literally just treated it like a grocery run instead of a gift.
Yes YTA. For getting her the same flowers as last year. And for not letting your son pick. Did you even make breakfast for her?
The day is suppose to be about her, and getting some burden of her back, but also, through effort showing how much you care. You put in zero effort, so that show’s her you don’t care about her.
NTA however its Mother’s Day, not partners day.
Letting them pick the things for her is what it is all about.
YTA, the point is the memory of him picking them out, not the convenience of the walk.
NAH, although the “sigh” at the end is obnoxious. For some people it’s about being remembered and appreciated by their family in general and for some they want to feel the “Mother” in Mother’s day and therefor think it’s important that the kids get active input.
Your wife leans defintely towards the second which you didnt know. But now you do: make a note of it for the next year
Look, I know it’s mother’s day not wife’s day, but the reality is that kids need help with these things and as a parent that is your responsibility. Why are you somehow trying to seem like the victim of the transparency of your lackluster effort and not including your child in the efforts of celebrating his mother?
YTA
YTA. You couldn’t be bothered to carry two bouquets home?? Seriously? Why didn’t you get the kid to pick one for his mum, take that home, then go back for YOUR mum’s after? She’s your wife, the mother of your child – when you make you new family, your mum takes a backseat for days like this. That ‘sigh’ at the end does you no favours either.
YTA for not putting a lot of effort and for constantly calling your wife ‘the wife’ (eye roll). Do you even like your wife?
ESH
You put in minimum effort, but the reaction is a bit silly.
These unwritten expectations over made up holidays is what drives them to become box ticking exercises we dread rather than holidays we look forward to.
YTA, especially to the “sigh” at the end.
Why wouldn’t the bouquet you got with your son be for her and you went back and go a different bouquet for your mom? This wasn’t hard you did pick a bouquet with your son for Mother’s Day and then you gave it to your mother.
It’s also not hard to remember and choose different bouquet than last year. If you don’t know flower kinds then go by color. Last year we got her purple, this year we’ll go pink or red.
That sigh just emphasizes how irritating you find your wife and she’s asking for the bare minimum and you’re acting like you spent hours doing this.
Shaking my head at the Americans in the comments who can’t seem to wrap their head around the fact that other countries and cultures exist.
NTA for this at all