Hello everyone! First time posting on this sub haha.
I’m a teen with a preteen brother. He’s very into gaming, as am I, and loves to go on voice calls with his friends. I have no problem with him having fun, as he frequently accuses me of. The calls are just SO LOUD. His yelling is constant and grating, and I’m sure many of you can imagine how loud a preteen boy playing video games can be.
The place where he’s set up is a living room-esque area. It’s very open, with no door to seal it off. It’s right next to the kitchen, and also isn’t separated from the actual living room with the TV in it, where I often like to chill out. So, whenever he’s on voice call, screaming and laughing, I simply cannot be in the kitchen or the living room. I’m forced to go to my room, which sucks because I hate being pent up in there for hours (that’s how long he’ll be on call for, almost every day, even after school).
So, I’ve frequently suggested that he makes the very easy move to the back room, a spare room a few metres away from the desk he’s currently stationed at. It has a desk where he can plug in his laptop and play games with no reduced functionality at all, and it’s sealed by a door so his shouting doesn’t reverberate around the house as much. It’s a reasonable solution, but guess what? My mum and brother act like I’m asking the world of them.
Whenever I tell him to move, because he’s being loud, my mum and brother start whining; my brother says I hate him having fun, and my mum tells me I’m being bossy and mean. My brother also tells me to just go to my room, which is stupid, because I shouldn’t be the one to compromise in this situation. Is it not basic decency to go into another room if you’re on a call with someone? I’m being absolutely silent as I read my book or play games with my headphones on, so why should I make the move and be restricted to one room of the house in order to not hear the banshee shrieking? Even now, when he’s in the back room (I had a very long argument in order to get him in there) I can still hear him screaming. At least it’s better than when he was out in the open I guess.
Basically, I just don’t get how this move (keep in mind he games on a laptop, not a PC, so the move is very quick and simple) is such a big ask when he’s the one being so loud. Thanks in advance for your responses!
NTA, but like.. duh.
exactly haha. i know it seems obvious, but my mum and brother really do act like i’m being an asshole.
A bit of unsolicited advice; in the time it took you to write a post on reddit, you probably could have had a respectful conversation with your mom (or dad) (or whoever) outlining these issues, especially before your brother did it again, that way it wouldn’t come off as an emotional response.
Maybe that’s worth a try?
NTA. They were being the a for not considering your needs and requests. I’m a heavy gamer as well but am reasonable enough to know that if the audio for my games were getting too loud that it bothers to turn down the volume or if asked to do so I’d do it out of respect, not just because I was asked to do so.
You do not want to move to your room and he does not want to move to the back room- stalemate. You could record him on a call to show him how loud he is being, but if your mum is not bothered about this you have zero chance of it working. The only suggestion is to negotiate taking turn about in using the space.
NTA.
nta. it’s clear who your mom’s favorite is.
NTA, maybe it’s time to do something else loud in the shared space. Spend plenty of time making smoothies in a loud blender, play some loud music, etc