I (27m) and my friend’s wife (25f) have always been on daggers drawn with each other for basically 9 years.
There have been many cases which they wanted to end their relationship and every time my friend (28m) would come to me to complain about their stuff and how he wanted to break up but he never would.
Just for the context, there has been a time that I basically implied heavily that she is a cheating wh\*re because of a thing she seemed that she was doing but in the end I was wrong about her on that time. (not trying to imply that she has ever been)
They had forgiven me and after my friend and her got married I figured I should make things right between us for good, so I started trying to see her from another prism, I honestly think that she is not a bad person and even defended her on other fights they had with my friend, but she ultimately did not believe me.
Recently she got offended because I made her a gift that originally was an item I bought for myself, she did not ask for it but I felt bad that I did not get something for her from an event I had gone. She returned it to me after 40 days with a letter explaining the reasoning and that she did not want anyone else to know about this. It made me a bit sad but **I apologized** **that she got offended by it (she thought I gave it to her because I took pity on her) and explained that I did not do it in that sense.**
She then proceeded to describe the event to our friends so I explained my side in all of this. Next day she started calling me names and insulting me heavily on personal messages because I did not respect her wish to not involve anyone else, in the meantime my friend (her husband) was away for work so I decided to consult him, his response was solve it by yourselves.
I kept trying to say to her to stop insulting me and stop talking to me but she didn’t, I ended up muting her but she then texted me more insults on my cellphone. So, on a whim, I decided to take screenshots of all of the conversation with her, my friend and the cellphone messages and posted it in the group chat. AITAH?
Fuck me, you both need to grow up.
This. Like wtf is this, high school?
This was impossible to follow.
ESH. I don’t really know what happened because wtf? You all sound like a seriously ridiculous bunch of assholes though.
this surely cannot be real
You don’t like her. Fair enough. BUT! You falsely accused her, you encouraged her husband to leave her, you betrayed her request for privacy… all while claiming to try to get on with her and wondering why she doesn’t accept your sincerity.
>”So, on a whim, I decided to take screenshots of all of the conversation with her, my friend and the cellphone messages and posted it in the group chat.”
YTA
If anyone can follow this post enough to come to an actual judgement, hats off to them.
this was… so confusing. and both of you need to grow up, ngl.
the little i’ve gathered (but i could be wrong bc, again. very confusing), is that she spoke about the event thing in front of other people, and when you said your side of the story, she got mad because you spoke about it…?
idk it’s confusing
ESH I don’t believe that you didn’t mean to offend her, since you’ve been calling her names before the gift thing
“Recently she got offended because I made her a gift that originally was an item meant for me, she did not ask for it but I felt bad that I did not get something for her from an event I had gone. She returned it to me after 40 days with a letter explaining the reasoning and that she did not want anyone else to know about this. It made me a bit sad but I apologized and I did not mean to offend her in any way by giving her that item.”
No, you need to be more precise because this makes no sense (and the problem is not your english, it’s that you are vague posting to the point we can’t vote).
I feel like this story is confusing because you are intentionally leaving out information, and my guess is because that information would make you look bad.
But from the vague, half story you’ve told thus far, you called her a horrible name in an accusation which you ended up being wrong about, and you do things she explicitly asks you not to do that make her look bad to her friends. Thats enough for me to say YTA
What was the gift? What was the event? Why would you feel that you should bring her a gift from this event? Why do you not like her hanging out with your group of friends when her husband cannot? Is she not allowed to have friends? Why mention that you called her a name if all had been forgiven and it has nothing to do with the rest of the story? What did her letter say and why didnt she want you to tell the rest of the group?
So you’ve known each other since you were 18 and she was 16? With daggers drawn at each other from that time? Have you had a crush on her? Do you still?