This actually happened a few days ago, and I’m still not sure if I handled it the right way. So I had plans to meet my friend Meg at a store because she wanted my help picking out a few things for her new apartment. She asked me specifically to come because she trusts my taste and didn’t want to shop alone. No problem I moved some things around in my day to make time for her. We agreed to meet at 3 PM. I got there on time. She texted me at 3:10 saying, On my way. About around 3:30 she texted me again saying she is in Traffic., patiently waiting for her. About 4:05 she texted Almost there. By 4:45, she still hadn’t shown up. Meanwhile, I was literally walking around the store for almost two hours, trying not to look weird or lost. I even kept checking certain aisles because she said that’s where she’d meet me. I didn’t want to be rude, so I waited longer than I normally would. Eventually, at 4:55, I texted her that I was going home because I had other things to do and my back was starting to hurt from standing so long. She replied instantly suddenly she was no longer stuck in traffic and said I was being dramatic She said she needed me there and that I ruined her day by leaving. Later that night, she sent a long message about how I abandoned her and how she counted on me. I reminded her that she kept me waiting for almost two hours with no real updates, but she said I should’ve just waited because friends show up. Now she’s ignoring my messages and acting like I betrayed her. A mutual friend even said I could have stayed since I was already there. But I honestly feel like if someone values your time, they show up or at least communicate properly. AITA for leaving after she kept me waiting for hours?
NTA. If “friends show up” like she says, then she should’ve showed up. On time. For the activity that she asked you to do as a favor to her.
NTA. If she’s 15 min late sure but two hours is crazy. You have other things to do.
NTA. I would’ve left after 30 min.
Thanks everyone for your thoughts. I just want to clarify that I really value my friends, which is why I made time to go help her. I waited patiently and even walked around to avoid being awkward, but waiting almost two hours with vague updates felt unreasonable. I think respecting each other’s time is part of being a good friend, and I shouldn’t feel guilty for leaving when it was clear she wasn’t coming anytime soon.
Dear “friend”, I agree with you. Friends show up which is why I was pi$$ed to be standing around a store for 2 hours when you didn’t show up. I literally rearranged my day to be there for you and you stood me up.
SHE abandoned YOU and ruined YOUR day. That’s some seriously messed up transference. I personally would have no more truck with her until she apologizes sincerely. Probably not gonna happen. She sounds like a spoilt brat
“Because friends show up”.
There’s your answer right there.
SHE didn’t show up.
SHE did not show up, but YOU certainly did. AND, you waited for almost 2 hours….and SHE did not care enough to apologize or keep you updated on where she was or how much longer till she would arrive. SHE, by her own definition, is certainly no friend. NTA Op, at all! Move forward.
100% this ⬆️👌🏻. Definitely NTA.
Funny how she INSTANTLY was no longer stuck in traffic….
My response: I showed up, you didn’t.
That’s it.
NTA You did show up. You just didn’t stay longer than 2 hours waiting for her to show up. But you did show up! And that mutual friend isn’t really mutual. She’s her friend, not yours. Did you ask if she would have waited longer than 2 hours? Next time she can help your ex-friend pick what she needs, you are out.
NTA. “I was being dramatic She said she needed me there and that I ruined her day by leaving.” That is way too much drama in your life.
This fell apart at 3:10 when she said “OMW” ten minutes after you were supposed to meet. That is just disrespectful from the beginning.
1 – You waited FAR longer than I would have.
2 – She is not your friend.
NTA