So my sis comes to my room every couple of hours to yap her head off. Drama with her friends, Instagram, her YouTube channel, you name it, she yaps it. I’m usually in the middle of gaming, doing some 3d work, or studying for uni, so I just let her talk. I nod, say “mhm” or “that sucks” when needed, but I lowkey dont match her energy or ask follow-up questions. I’m not mean about it; I just listen quietly while doing my own thing. Every once in a while, if I’m bored or feeling bad about not being enthusiastic enough, I’ll go to her room and let her yap to me there because I’m not an a-hole.
So like yesterday I had something I was genuinely excited to share: the whole Netflix vs. Paramount+ standoff over the Warner Bros. Discovery content deals, the potential price hikes, what it means for shows, etc. So I went to her room, started explaining it, and before I was even two sentences in she gave me the blankest stare and said, “Yeah, I don’t care about that boring stuff. Get outta my room”
Mom happened to be walking by, overheard it, and lost it on my sister. She went off about how my sister always expects everyone to listen to her “endless nonsense” but the one time I try to share something I care about, she shuts me down and calls it boring. Mom made her apologize to me and lectured her for like ten minutes about being supportive and not killing people’s excitement.
My sister has been icy with me ever since and keeps saying I “threw her under the bus.” Cuz like I easily could have jumped in and told Mom, “Ma, I’m the same way when she talks to me, we’re even.” But I didn’t. I just stood there quietly and let my sister take the full scolding because, honestly, it felt good to watch her get called out for once.
AITA for staying quiet and letting her get chewed out?
Can you tell me how old you guys are? No judgement, I just want to give the proper age appropriate advice.
I’m 19, she’s 17
Okay, so – 17 year old girls are gunna yap, but if she gets to yap, so should you get to yap, I’m sorry that your sister is so self involved that she doesn’t want to listen to you yap like you listen to her yap
That being said, what your mom did to your sister is bullying. Has your mom ever said anything to you about you not listening to your sister? Has she ever went out of your way to make you feel as bad as she tried to make your sister feel?
Siblings fight, it’s normal, but siblings are also supposed to protect each other. Don’t encourage your mom bullying your sister.
I disagree. I don’t think it’s was bullying, but rather disciplining. Was it too harsh? Possibly.
Yet, given the sister’s later complain to OP about him not lying to their mother (lying because he does give her the space to yap – learned a new word today…), I have a feeling she might be somewhat entitled and was rather rude, and so the mother got fed up with this attitude.
NTA
This is not bullying; it’s parenting or disciplining.
Sometimes you dont feel like listening but are polite or you know it means something to the other person so you do your best and listen.
Sometimes someone comes into your room while you’re busy and starts broadcasting at you while they should know you’re busy. That’s rude of them but also no harm done from your side if you dont follow actively.
And then there is the case when the role of the listener and talker are reversed but they dont care to match your level of consideration.
Relationships should be a two way street in this department. You cant be that self-centered and expect everyone to always listen but you wont do the same for them on occasion. Their mother was right to call it out. It’s selfish.
🤣 It sounds like the universe aligned at that moment in time. Definitely NTA.
nta. she wanted you to jump in and defend her, but in all fairness, you don’t do that to her. so you’d be lying to say “it’s fair” it’s not fair, she comes in and impedes on your personal space and then when you come to try and yap with her on a topic you like she immediately shuts you down. sometimes in life we have conversations that doesn’t always interest us, that’s a part of life. if she expects you to sit and listen to her nonsense then surely she can sit and listen to yours.
NTA, but also not that deep. My brother and I do the same thing. He goes on about shit I don’t care about, i’ll tell him idc but, he’ll barrel over me and keep talking. And i’ll force him to listen to my shit even when I know he doesn’t care. You guys are siblings at the end of the day, tell her you love her, you’ll both listen to each other’s shit and get over it.
Honestly, you’re deeping it. You’re sisters. This kinda thing is gonna happen.
If you react monotonously to her and she got in trouble for doing the same to you, then you could have stepped in. But it sounds like overall, she’s crossing your boundaries and you’re sick of it. Ask her to knock before she comes in and be aware that you are sometimes deep in work and can’t be interrupted.
Then make a little schedule or routine where you spend quality time together so you both get your yaps out when it’s convenient.
You may not care what she has to say, but you let her babble on with whatever she is saying. You don’t cut her off 2 sentences in & say, “I don’t care about that, its boring. Get out of my room.” You allow her to “vent” or just babble on. She’s the AH & got caught. Good on your mom for setting her straight. I’m sure she’s had to hear her babble on about some nonsense.
NTA, she was kinda blunt lmao. Its not that big of a deal tho
NTA, you have been very polite by listening to her like you do: personally, I would be saying right back at her “sorry, I’m not interested in your rant, leave me alone please,” just to give her a taste of her own medicine, but I’m petty like that.
NTA
what your mum did is raising and educating her, as a good parent should. And if she says so, it is because your sister probably spurs it to her too