I am a 25-year-old female, and I have a group of eight friends, all around my age, with whom I enjoy going on ski trips. Among this group are my sister (E) and her close male friend(F), who is also a " friend " (D)to the rest of us. However, neither my sister nor I particularly care for him, as he has been quite disrespectful to my family, especially my father, in the past.
Recently, we were planning a ski trip for the New Year, and during the discussion about whether it would be a one-day or two-day trip, my sister’s friend asked his own friend for his preference. I was quite surprised to learn that this individual would also be joining us. While a one-day trip would not pose an issue, I am uncomfortable with the idea of him staying at my house, especially since my sister and I are the only ones with accommodations in that area. Therefore, I am wondering if I would be in the wrong to express that I do not wish for him to stay at my home under any circumstances.
TLDR
Me (C) my sister (E) and our friend (F) are close friends
He has a friend (D)
Me and my sister we don’t like (D) and we aren’t friends we are friendly but not friends
F invited D to ski trip
We don’t know if is going to be a day trip or 2 day trip
If is going to be a 2 day trip they will have to stay at our home
i don’t want D at my home
D is an asshole he has been disrespectful to Me,my sister and my dad
I like F I don’t like D
NTA. Your house and you don’t have to let anyone stay there who you don’t want there.
Make sure you’re aligned with your sister on this – it’s possible she has another understanding with her best friend. Once you’re aligned that the disrespectful person is not welcome, your sister should let her best friend know and ask him to handle it. If the best friend disagrees or won’t, then speak to the disrespectful person yourselves.
She actually told we that she doesn’t want him either
Then what is the issue? Just don’t invite him
He is obsessed with him at a point that he tried to set them up him and my sister
Good for him, however he’s not the house owner so he can kick rocks. Just tell him you don’t want his rude friend in your home
I might be the AH for saying that your lack of punctuation hurts my brain. However I understand your question & IMO you are justified in inviting (or not inviting) who ever you want on this trip.
Info. Your timeline is confusing to me. Were you discussing this trip in front of the annoying guy? If you were YTA for discussing plans in front of someone that will not be invited.
If you were not then NTA and just tell the nice friend annoying guy isn’t invited.
Reguardless It sounds like it is Dads house not yours and Dad has final say as to who can be there and so tell everyone Dad says this guy isn’t welcome.
Unreadable. Try again.
Big yikes my guy, where’s your grammar?
NTA- your house, your rules.
Conditional NTA: if this friend-of-a-friend was not part of the original group plan, and invited by your friend to stay at your place – without securing your prior consent… Then the only AH in this is your friend who overstepped. This may be a group trip, but y’all are staying in a private residence, so NO ONE has the right to add to the group without first getting the consent of the ‘homeowner’. Just as your friend would not be allowed to offer up your car or your money to some other person without asking you first, this is no different.
NTA- It’s incredibly presumptuous to think that a stranger who does not know the owner/family would be allowed to crash at their house. I would tell your sister’s friend that while you’re not trying to exclude his friend from your trip, you’re not okay with someone you don’t know being invited to stay at your family’s house without your knowledge or permission. Obviously he’s not going to like that answer, but it needs to be said. He never should have assumed that would be okay without talking to you or your sister first.
YWBTA if you didn’t discuss with your sister who is invited and why friend of friend shouldn’t be invited to dad’s cabin and then make this clear to the guy. Otherwise he’ll turn up on the expectation of having a bed for the night.
nTA. Your sister’s friend was extremely rude and self-centered to invite his friend. Tell him he has to uninvite him and tell him why.