TLDR
My boyfriend and I have been together 3 years and lived together for 1.
Over the last like 3-4 weeks my boyfriend has been hinting at that he thinks my brother and I talk too much or are too close.
My brother and I are 1 1/2 years apart and it’s just us. He’s my best friend through and through and has always been the best big brother. Of course I have other female friends outside of him, but there’s just stuff that they don’t get because they aren’t family, they don’t know the family tea like us.
My brother calls a few times a week when he has a long drive after work or just whenever he has a long drive.
Sometimes I answer, sometimes I don’t.
Whenever I’m with my boyfriend, I don’t answer bc I got a feeling that he’s bothered by it like 3 months ago.
So tonight I was telling my boyfriend id love if he played a video game that I’ve been begging him to play with me for months and he once again said no. So then I said I’m just going to start playing by myself and he asked with who I would play with and I said maybe id play with my brother online. And then he said “oh why? So you guys can talk for 20 more hours?” And I said “yeah because he’s literally the only other person I know that plays video games online.” And he said “you talk to him more than you talk to your own boyfriend” and I told him “that’s not true. I literally live with you. What are you jealous of my brother? That’s fucking weird?” And he said “yeah it is. “ which I think he meant like, it’s weird that him and I talk? Idk but I refuse to let him drive a wedge between my brother and I.
My brother and I talk like once a week now. And even still, my boyfriend seems to be bothered by it.
If it was my mom I know he wouldn’t react the same. I’m literally so bothered.
That’s so so odd. I would listen to your gut feeling, and run. If you stay he’s going to assume that behavior is okay, and it’ll escalate. Just seems like the beginnings of a very controlling relationship
Anyone who gets ‘jealous’ of the fact that you are on good terms with a family member/friend of the opposite sex and claims it’s weird is a person who will eventually insist that you cut off your entire social circle then accuse you of being against them when you say no.
Your bf is testing the waters to see what you’ll do for him in the name of commitment with no intentions of ever doing the same thing for you. Do not waste time trying to appease someone who is being unreasonable and immature over something like this.
Was there any trigger? Did something happen when this all started that you can pin point? Maybe something you or your brother did that was weird to him and he’s unable to talk about it and he’s just become passive aggressive about it.