WIBTA if I don’t go to my niece’s baby shower? This niece is about 20 yrs old on my husband’s side. My husband is the youngest of 4 so when we got married she was 14ish. I never had a problem with her until the last few years where she basically went off the deep end and treats my sister in law and most family members like crap. I can’t go into too much detail because I want to stay anonymous. We’ve all given her a million second chances but I’m over it. I don’t want to deal with her and her stories, threats, and nonsense anymore and I don’t want my young kids exposed to her. At family parties I’m obviously civil out of respect for my husband and in laws, but I’m not going out of my way to engage. Now she’s pregnant and wants this elaborate shower and my sister in law is acting as if nothing has happened and giving this to her and expecting us all to go. I just don’t think I can. She doesn’t deserve it and I won’t be able to act like all of this is okay. So, would I be the ahole?
NTA.
As they say, it’s an invitation, not a summons.
Send a gift for the baby and don’t go
Don’t go. Say that you are sick.
I’d still send a gift for the baby.
NTA. There is no requirement you attend.
they want gifts and money only!!
NTA. She’s pretty young to be having a child and it sounds like her behavior is still pretty childlike herself if she’s not treating the family well. When the reality of raising a baby hits her things are going to get tough. I’d stay way clear because there’s the chance of a lot of future drama in her life. Send a card, or a small gift if you want. But I wouldn’t go. Politely decline.
NTA… Just reply with a “who” and have priority commitments that day like a root canal or colonscopy
NTA. Decline politely, maybe send a card or gift, and be done with it. You won’t be comfortable there, and it’ll at some point make other people uncomfortable.
Hmmm I think you have library books that need returning that day, don’t you?
I don’t think so, but be prepared for the family to feel otherwise.
Quick, cook up a prior commitment, quietly, and be busy. Take your kids to a museum or volunteer at a food shelf or help a disabled neighbor with a chore.
NTA, just send a normal gift and express regret at not being able to attend.
NTA you are not available when the date is announced.