My best friend of 11 years is pregnant. She recently told me she would like me to be her baby’s Godmother. I don’t have children myself and I’ve never been interested. She does know this. I am very flattered that she asked me but I ended up telling her that I’m probably not the right person to ask as I’m not too keen on children. I do have a nephew who is 4 that I absolutely adore but I never want to be responsible for a child. I feel like I can barely look after myself sometimes. She became very upset and told me she wanted me to be Godmother as she would like to be able to have a life when the baby is born and she thought I would be up for babysitting etc. I told her absolutely not and I would never agree to something like that. I live about 4 hours away from her as well.
She then tried to guilt me and say that if something happened to her, the baby would have no where to go as she doesn’t have family that she’d trust with her baby.
I told her I’m really sorry and that I could help her out occasionally but I don’t feel comfortable being her baby’s Godmother. AITA?
NTA – if it’s a best friend of 11 years who should have known / had plenty of opportunities to know your perspective on children, that is 100% on her. Nobody should be guilted into babysitting or taking care of a child if they don’t want.
So true. A lot of people don’t realize the imposition it is to ask something like that. They see it as a ‘gift’, when really it’s an enormous obligation and life choice. Incredible!
Also the godmother isn’t just a free babysitting smh
I don’t think my godmother ever babysat me.
I did spend at couple weeks at her summer cottage every summer from age 7 onwards during the day, but that was more to see my cousin, not because I couldn’t be home alone (because that is what I did the rest of summer break). But that was the 90s, when kids had far less supervision.
In my country godparents aren’t going to get custody of the kid either if the parents die, the “task” of a godparent is to support the childs faith and religious upbringing or something along those lines.
I agree because I also am not big on kids(obviously), but so many people think that they can fix you, and think you’ll change once you meet the kid.
It may take a village to raise a child, but you can’t forcibly conscript someone into your village.
NTA
Under normal circumstances, I would say NAH bc she isn’t an AH to ask, and you aren’t an AH to decline, but what makes her an AH is she tried to guilt-trip and pressure you to do something you don’t want to do.
> the baby would have no where to go as she doesn’t have family that she’d trust with her baby.
this makes me giggle cause how does “friend who don’t wanna” check off the list of places a baby can go???
NTA.
Who lives FOUR hours away
A godparent is not a person that you can guilt into babysitting because they are their god parent. Usually it is related to acting as a mentor and giving guidance and being a role model, this is usually related to faith as well.
It really sounds like she just wanted to use it as a way to manipulate you into babysitting.
NTA godmothers job isn’t to babysit the kid so mom can “have a life”. She is in for a rude reality
Nta “she wants to have a life once the baby is born” too damn bad! Then don’t have a kid! She’s being a shitty friend for trying to foist babysitting duty on you.
Yeah that line is ridiculous. She clearly just wants free babysitting and that’s not a defined responsibility of a god parent.
She’s looking for a nanny, not a godmother. NTA.
NTA. Does godparent mean something other than helping the child with their faith? I mean, clearly she thinks it does, but it that common?