I, 19M have been paying off a car loan from my mom, 40F, since I turned 16. She “gifted” me a new 2022, current year, Nissan Sentra for my birthday. I foolishly never asked how much she signed for because I had assumed that her financially knowledgeable boyfriend at the time would know what he was doing at the dealership. He did not. The original MSRP for my car capped at around $20,000, out the door they walked away with a $40,000 car loan. They put nothing down and had a 10% interest rate Becuase my mom’s credit was bad and she had no job. But even accounting that the math never made sense to me. The payments every month was $510. I didn’t care because the original deal was that me and my mom’s boyfriend would split the monthly note. That lasted for all of 3 months until I was stuck paying the entire thing and have been since that day. About a year ago I went to the bank with my mom to try to transfer the loan from her name to mine but since the interest would be recalculated and would add about $10,000 to the loan we both agreed to not do it. I moved out at 18 and live with a roommate but bills have been tighter. My girlfriend’s mom suggested that I look for a new car that’s more in budget and I found a used 2025 carola with 10k miles for $18k. A better car for cheaper than what I would be paying off of my current car. I told my mom that I was planning to get a new car and if she wanted to sell my current car it would be her decision and she lost her shit. Saying how it’s my responsibility and that it was a “gift” for me and how she “saved” me $10,000 by not transferring the loan. The biggest elephant is that she’s freshly divorced and is looking for a job to support her two younger girls. I told her she can sell the car for about $14-$15k but she refuses and is demanding that I drain my savings to pay for a car that I never agreed to pay for and ultimately was their terrible financial decision. On one hand I don’t feel like I owe her anything and never truly got along with my mom so it is what it is. On the other hand I feel guilty for kicking her while she’s down. Looking for unbiased opinions. Thank you.
Go park the Sentra in her driveway, hand her the keys, and walk away.
You let her problems become your problems. This is your out.
God bless you
I’m giving you the car back mom! Happy birthday!
As long as your name is NOT on the loan or title, *it’s not your car.*
It’s her car (and her boyfriend’s, if he’s on the loan/title), which makes it her obligation.
NTA.
Nope the car is not tied to me at all aside from my insurance that lapses tomorrow and it being in my driveway. God bless you.
That’s a pretty big mistake to take on as charity. For your stage in life 20k is everything. 20k is a lot for anyone. If it’s not in your name legally it’s not your responsibility. Morally you never agreed to pay for it. But your past actions gave her hope you would.
NTA.
A “gift” that comes with a $40k loan, 10% interest, and no clear agreement isn’t actually a gift — it’s a financial trap you were put into as a minor.
You’ve already paid thousands toward a decision you didn’t make, and it’s unreasonable to expect a 19-year-old to keep drowning financially because two adults made a terrible deal at a dealership.
It’s unfortunate that your mom is going through a hard time, but her current circumstances don’t retroactively make that loan your responsibility.
You’re not abandoning her — you’re protecting your future.
Thank you, god bless you
🏆🏆🏆🏆🏆 I absolutely love “but her current circumstances don’t retroactively make that loan your responsibility.” Well done, internet stranger!
How is it a gift if you’re paying the full note? Nta
It’s quoted for a reason, I know damn well it’s not a gift but that’s what she claims it to be. God bless you
That’s not a gift, it’s a debt.
Bills are tight so the solution is an $18k vehicle? Christ brother, get a clunker for $5k and drive the wheels off of it.
Very solid point but I can afford the corala comfortably and I know it’s going to outlive me so in me eyes it’s a solid decision