AITA for not answering the door bell when my sister was waiting in the rain?

My sister, 18F, is a college student and usually leaves to go to the bus stop at 7:30 am, sometimes later. It’s everyday that she comes back twice to get something she forgot and it’s really annoying. I wear headphones when I wake up because the music helps me start my day and she very much knows that. Today, she left and pressed the door bell, I couldn’t hear anything. We have a back door and front door, the back door is surrounded by a fence with a gate and she went through the back door because I didn’t answer the door, and yelled at me with my mom joining in that I should’ve answered the door. I understand she has classes but I think it’s her responsibility to not forget anything and also not expect someone to drop everything and attend to her needs, honestly if I forget something and it’s not that big of a deal, l will just leave but she comes back for little things like a bracelet. I also think it’s my fault for not hearing anything and I should work on my headphone habit. Now she won’t talk to me. AITA?

14 thoughts on “AITA for not answering the door bell when my sister was waiting in the rain?”
    1. Also, if she’s capable of going around to the back door and letting herself in, why is it necessary for OP to let her on on the first place?!

  1. NTA but you do need to consider turning the volume down if you can’t hear things whilst listening through your headphones.

    1. I have over ear headphones that are so good in keeping noise from me that I barely need any music with them. When I have them at 30% volume the world is silent around me.

      Some headphones are just so good even without loud music.

  2. NTA

    You literally didn’t hear the doorbell, it’s not as if you heard it and chose not to open it. Also, if she lives there…why doesn’t she have a key?

  3. NTA

    Wtf? Does she not have a key? Does her phone not work? She seems like she doesnt want to take responsibility for herself

  4. NTA

    Does she not have a key? Sounds like she just needs to get a key. Or use her phone to message someone to let her in. If you have headphones on, then you might hear the notification of a message.

  5. NTA. She should be responsible for remembering her own key. That’s not your responsibility, not the mental load you have to carry for her.

    My kids forget their keys, my youngest was locked out for a half an hour. He later told me he wants me to put his keys in the mailbox every morning. This means I would have to check to make sure he took his keys every morning, and if he forgot to put them in our apartment’s mail box. In the five minutes between when he leaves to when I leave. Everyday. No. Thats just adding to my mental load of remembering, checking, timing my exit and all sort of stuff.

    To me this is what your sister and mom are saying. They want you to listen and watch for your sister, every morning until she has really left for college, just in case she comes back.

    I see your mother maybe being upset that it’s so loud that can’t hear if something is happening, because that maybe a little of a safety issue. But you shouldn’t have to listen for your sister.

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