My mum, today, decided to tell me she fell out of her bed in the night and hurt her knee somehow, sprained her ankle and now has a headache so a potential head injury on the way down, after I got to work today which is a 9-6 shift.
She’s 63, has unrelated health complications and diabetes, which from my understanding can impact injuries and make recovery times slower, and can make injuries worse – let me know about that one.
I want to take her regardless, to be seen and checked out. I rang the hospital, their X-Rays are open until midday. I ask my manager if I could leave for about 40 minutes to take her there with my brother to be with her, plus we have one car in the household and the wheelchair lives in the boot of the car, so a taxi isn’t an option. I got the all clear. But my mum keeps saying no, obviously.
Now the main part – I rang my wife who’s home, and very specifically ask her to just check on her, look at her knee and whatnot and if she agrees with me to try to convince her to go if we could. My wife gets really annoyed at me saying that if she doesn’t want to go, we can’t force her – but she’s refusing to even go look, ask how she is, see it etc. That’s all I want. Well I want a hospital trip to check her out, but I made it clear just to see and ask.
My wife has become so angry over this, sticking very closely to the ‘we can’t force her’. The thing is, if she’s actually broke something, or anything else, head related, her leg or anything, I’m worried. I work a lot, I got the all clear, I’ll pay the taxi to go home, that’s fine. I’m just so angry that I’m sat here at work right now typing this out when I should be probably working, really worried and being left to feel like a prick.
This is UK by the way, no healthcare fees, just waiting times and a taxi home. Other factors, my wife has a cold and wants to rest – I do get that and I have been very patient in waiting for her to go check in her own time. AITA for also expecting her to not JUST focus on her own sickness and go see my mum? She can go back to bed after, but man she’s not dying.
Let me know. My first post here. I just don’t want to feel crazy in all this and that I’m always the problem. I really am I just worried. Thanks.
Falls are a leading cause of injury-related death for people over 60. Bob Saget is an example of someone who died from a seemingly non-fatal fall.
Your concern about getting her checked is a valid concern.
It is true, you can’t force her to seek medical exam, but you should try.
YTA If *you*’re so convinced she needs hospital care you should go there yourself, ask your brother or call an ambulance. You say you could leave work, so why didn’t you? This is no way your wife’s responsibility, especially not when being sick herself.