So I’m a 19 year old college student and I brought edible (weed gummy for those who don’t know) and I had it in my drawer but it wasn’t my intention to even take it I don’t do drugs. I understand it’s a crime but I don’t find the invasion of privacy very interesting and then coming to project his life onto mine and then drug testing me for it. Even if I offered I feel like we crossed a line of trust that I unfortunately can’t go back to. Even if I offered, the even doubt of him thinking that and then testing me for it just saddens me. Yes what I did was wrong and I understand that and apologized but I don’t think it should’ve came to that especially since I’m an adult and after speaking with other people, I want to either
A. Finish my first year of college and move to the dorms (waiting til August to get out)
B. Finishing my first year and enlisting in the military
C. Being stuck here
I grew up on strict parents aka them so idk what to do. I don’t party or do anything bc I’m not allowed to and I go to college until the afternoon and stay home for the rest of the day even on the weekends (I can’t sleep over at my friend’s dorms, never been allowed to do anything rlly), any advice?
NTA maybe consider study abroad for a semester if you can. Ffs don’t join the military tho. Who knows what kind of conflict you would be part of.
So you bought an illegal drug into your parents’ house?
Yeah you’re massively TA. Why did you buy it in the first place. I don’t blame your dad for wanting a drug test.
The other stuff is hard to speak on, but just based off this post it does honestly seem kind of hard to trust you.
I say you should obviously not do it again, then move out when you can if you feel you’re not really allowed to do anything or feel your parents are abusive.
Fuck you, Reagan. The man just said he bought a weed gummy and you’re gonna tell him he’s breaking the goddamn rules of the universe. God forbid you ever have children that you abuse in such a way.
…where did it say/imply that OP is “breaking the rules of the universe”
wild take
Neither are assholes. Why did you buy a gummy and then store it if you had no intention to use?
It’s normal to feel upset when you someone imposes a restriction or requirement on you. But you just have to deal with it and move on or change your circumstances so you don’t have to deal it in the future. That’s what being an adult is about.
I’m assuming you live rent free without a lease. So, even though you are an adult he may have contingencies to live with him for free e.g. drug testing. If you don’t like it then move out, but this seems like a small thing for free rent whilst in university.
NTA. One time my mom told the dr at our physical to drug test me and I was genuinely hurt by it lol I’m not sure I can put my finger on why, but I was definitely not doing drugs *at all*. It stung.
Additionally, you’re **19** lol you’re a big boy/girl. You can make your own choices. Weed is like.. legal? Idk where you live but it’s legal in where I am. It’s definitely not as bad as alcohol.
NTA – You’re being respectful to your parent’s rules while living under their roof (and it sounds like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders yourself). Appreciate what they’ve done for you, but don’t be afraid to make the decisions that are right for yourself. If you’re doing well at school, and like your studies, then the adult choice is to finish your first year at school while staying at home. While it’s not an immediate remedy, it will give you time to plan for the move to the dorms and set yourself up for success. Joining the military is a big commitment, but not a bad option. Think long and hard about that. But whatever you do, don’t do nothing. We all have the lives we are willing to accept. Never accept anything less than what’s right for you.
Bringing illegal substances into is parents house is being respectful to their rules?
Do your parents pay for your college?
Do you expect them to also pay for your room and board at the dorm?
If so, don’t expect complete privacy. If you pay your own way, you get full privacy like any other adult.
YTA, you seem immature for your age, you brought an illegal substance into your parents house, hid it and didn’t tell them. that means you knew why they wouldn’t approve but still did it, How are you the one acting surprised when your dad reacted like an adult? If you don’t use drugs why did you bought and hid it in your room? that part is annoying because it sounds like a lie
Was your dad wrong to drug test you? Yes.
not because you had weed in your drawer,but because you’re 19 and living in your own body, not a prison, he definitely could have handled it better, but did you do something wrong? Also yes
YTA. You brought an illegal substance into your parents house. Your intentions on taking it or not don’t matter. He’s not protecting his life onto yours….youre choosing to live under his roof so that means his rules. Don’t like it? Get a job and move out.
Kinda ESH for me. On one hand, your parents going through your stuff is extreme at the best of times, if not flat out abusive. On the other, you brought illegal drugs into your parents home, and drug testing you as a result isn’t that wild an overreaction. Edibles are low risk, but if they’re illegal where you are, it makes their reaction more understandable.
Presumably you’re staying there for free, or at least at way less than market rent, so while I find it invasive and distasteful, they do have a right to know what’s going on in their home. They have a vested interest in making sure you’re not doing drugs in their home.
No one buys edibles for the sake of letting them sit in a drawer and then throw them away. Why lie? Your parents rightfully didn’t believe that, and I sincerely doubt anyone else will either.
Move out if you want more privacy, but know dorms are going to evict you if you being drugs into them too. They don’t usually search your stuff, but the consequences would be more severe. The army? You’ll have absolutely ZERO privacy. Shared sleeping, your things searched constantly, you’ll be lucky to be able to poop in peace, and if you manage that miracle, they’re still going to time you. 😅
If you want to experiment, do so intelligently. You’re in college.
Bro why are you just straight up lying. I don’t feel like you would have been judged here by just saying you got it. But no you’re saying you got it and “totally” would have thrown it out.
I am sorry about the situation. Yta for brining in illegal items into your parents house.
I don’t think they should be illegal, I don’t partake in those, but I do believe its unfortunate that its illegal by you.
“Yeah I brought it home but I wasn’t going to do it! How dare you not believe me with the evidence in my hands!!” Come on man your dad isn’t dumb & you’re disrespecting him more trying to play him dumb than he’s disrespecting you by what.. being a caring father? You’re tripping out bc you’re nonetheless caught in a bad situation & you don’t like it. If you really don’t get high pop the drug test & make your dad feel stupid.