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I (21M) share an apartment with my roommate “Ben” (22M). We split rent evenly. No written rules beyond basic stuff like cleaning shared areas and not blasting music late at night.
I wake up at 5:30 AM on weekdays for school + a part-time job. Ben doesn’t work mornings and usually sleeps around 2–3 AM gaming or watching videos.
I try to be quiet, but realistically I still make some noise: alarm goes off once, I shower, make coffee, and leave by 6:15. I don’t play music, I don’t talk loudly, and I prep most of my stuff the night before.
Recently Ben started complaining that I’m “ruining his sleep” and said I should either: • change my alarm to vibrate only
• stop showering in the morning
• or wait to make coffee until I leave
I told him I’m already being reasonable and that if sleep is an issue, he could go to bed earlier or use earplugs / white noise.
He said that I’m the one causing the disturbance, so it’s my responsibility to adjust. He also told a few friends who now think I’m being inconsiderate and “prioritizing productivity over basic respect.”
I honestly don’t think waking up for work and school at a normal time is unreasonable, but now I’m second-guessing myself.
AITA?