Back in November, I mentioned to my boss (we have a close relationship) that I was planning a 4-country trip to Central America and needed to save up. He offered, unsolicited, to pay me a sum of money for use of my apartment while I was away for 3 weeks (since he lives out in the burbs). I agreed, as we’d done this before with minor, avoidable issues.
I have two cats. I had already arranged for someone to care for them during my trip. My boss knew about the cats also, and was never asked to care for them, and though he claims allergies, he’s owned cats before and said he could adjust over time.
Last week, he suddenly said, “You need to do something with your cats – I won’t use your apartment if they’re there.” I refused: “they’re my pets and they’re not leaving their home. After a back-and-forth argument, he backs out.
When I explained this hurt me financially; I’d budgeted his payment and lost nearly 3 months of saving time; he offered to still give the money but only if I “worked it off”. First, by helping him apply to new apartments. I detailed the effort involved, but he dismissed it as not worth the amount he was going to pay me. Then he proposed I help him move for two days; I declined. I’ve done that before and won’t again.
I countered; if he couldn’t honor the original deal, could he just lend me the money, and I’d repay it post – trip? He refused, saying, “Why should I give you an interest-free loan when I offered ways for you to earn it?”
He gave me three options: 1) Remove the cats, 2) Work it off, or 3) Carry on without help. I saw this as an ultimatum. He repeated, “You’re not entitled to my money. I gave you a fair way to earn it,” despite my asking for a loan, not payment for work.
Am I the a-hole for not accepting his new terms after he withdrew his original offer, knowing I had relied on it; and refusing to uproot my cats or do any heavy labour?
\> 1) Remove the cats, 2) Work it off, or 3) Carry on without help
No. No. Yes.
NTA. Why continue to argue with someone who is trying to trap you into work and scam you?
Get a housesitter, and/or postpone your trip if you can’t afford it.
NTA. At this point I would just not allow him near your apartment at all. You could try and see if you have any friends that need a short term rental. You can ask a bank for a loan, even with the interest it’ll be better for your mental health than being in debt to him.
To your question, NTA. The apartment is your cats home, and they are your pets and family. I wouldn’t let him in my apt because I would fear it would get rid of or harm my animals.
NTA. I have a cat too, there’s no way I would agree to something like that. He should’ve said he wasn’t okay with your cats before making a deal. Honestly, he sounds manipulative.
Leave work at work and dont mix it with it your personal life.
This. That was a bad idea to begin with.
NTA but let this be a lesson to never shit where you eat
NTA, but never agree to such a messy arrangement, with anyone, ever again.
Your relationship with your boss is weird. If you think you have some power keep doing whatever this is.
Otherwise, charge it to the game, save you money and do a different trip
I couldn’t agree more . It sounds odd and frankly, a bit creepy.
I wonder what the minor issues were from last time they had this arraignment 👀
Don’t have financial or emotional arrangements with bosses or coworkers. YTA for agreeing to it. Don’t go on trips if you can’t afford them.
NTA.
But a good rule of thumb for the future is NEVER spend money you don’t have in your hands. Do not plan a trip and then plan to use money you do not already have IN HAND. This is the perfect example of why.
Sorry but this boss-employee relationship sounds strange. If I were you, I would let it go and figure out something else. Don’t let him hang anything over you. It can’t lead to anything good.
YTA it your trip not your boss’s. Your boss is under no obligation to fund the trip. If your boss does not want the rent your place without the cats that is his choice and you can refuse to rent.