I’m 18F and I just started college a few months ago. I made a friend early on (also 18F) and we kind of bonded over struggling with classes and trying to adjust to college life. At first, we studied together, shared notes, and helped each other out.
Over time though, I noticed a pattern. She’d skip classes a lot, especially morning lectures, and then text me later asking for my notes, screenshots of slides, or explanations right before tests. I didn’t mind at first because I know adjusting is hard, but it started happening *every single week*.
Whenever I asked her to study together or come to class with me, she’d say she was tired, busy, or just “not feeling it.” But she never forgot to ask for notes. It started feeling less like friendship and more like I was her backup plan.
Last week before an important exam, she texted me asking for my notes again. I told her (politely) that I wasn’t comfortable sharing everything anymore since I actually attend the lectures and put time into making my notes. I suggested we study together next time instead.
She got upset and said I was being selfish and that “friends help each other.” Now she’s been distant and told a few people that I’m gatekeeping notes and being dramatic.
Some of our mutual friends think I should’ve just shared because it’s “not that deep,” but I feel like I’m allowed to set boundaries, especially when it’s affecting my own stress levels.
So… AITA for saying no?