AITA for sharing pictures of me and my new girlfriend in a cab in Vegas to my therapist the next week when I was just showing her what we had done for my birthday weekend? the photo was just my face and her face smiling in a cab. I was told that I should never share a picture without consent, but there didn’t seem to be anything private or intimate about the photo of our heads smiling. This boundary was never communicated to me at any point therefore how should I have known that I was crossing a line by sending that photo to my longtime therapist of over 10 years who I share a lot of things going on in my life with. Please tell me I’m not the.A$$hole. I completely understand respecting people’s boundaries but boundaries need to be communicated, especially when they’re not obvious common sense boundaries.
NTA but you have different values. Maybe find out what other unspoken rules exist for you in this relationship. Has she shared pictures of you with her friends? Did you consent?
Not that I know for sure. We’ve been dating for 3months. For her to snap at me the way that she did you would have thought that she made that boundary clear to me at some point. This topic has never been brought up until I told her that my therapist thought that we looked really good together. Kind weirding me out
NTA – unless she specifically said this was a problem before hand, then it’s an unusual demand. You shouldn’t be expected to read someone’s mind on bizarre stuff like this.
How would you go up to someone and list ALL the things you’re not okay with? There are so many situations you would have to specify for. The scenario has to come up to do so and it’s OP who had to ask her
YTA it’s commonly understood that you do not share someone’s photo without asking them first.
Why do you send photos casually to your therapist?? That’s strange
I’ve known her for over 10 years so she kind of knows what’s going on in my life and she wanted to see some photos from my birthday weekend. It was one photo of us two photos of a nice steak dinner and one photo of the really cool driver list, taxi cabs that Vegas has now.
“she wanted to see some photos from my birthday weekend.”
This seems odd, too. A bit too personal and not so much to do with therapy. Is it possible that you have known each other so long that professional boundaries are blurring?
It was during a scheduled session and meant to provide context to the story I was telling because it was an online zoom appointment
I think the general rule is to not send photos of someone else to anyone without their permission.
So YTA.
I appreciate the honesty and genuinely wanted to know others opinion because personally it would not have bothered me, but that doesn’t mean I’m all knowing and correct. Thank you
YTA because you’re sending pics to your therapist and you’ve only been with your gf for three months. Sorry, but I’d be weirded out. Showing it during a session would be fine I think, but why does your therapist need to have your photos on their phone? A therapist is different from friends or family. I know some people in the comments are saying you should never send pics without consent, but a selfie to your friends feels pretty normal to me. To your therapist, not so much.
Well it was an online zoom appointment and she is my therapist and everything is ALWAYS professional, and Ive been seeing her weekly for over 10yrs. So she knows me better than most so there is a higher level of trust and comfortability. Lesson learned and I’m okay with being wrong if it means that I don’t violate someone’s privacy and trust
Okay, I do think it matters that this was during a session because it sounded like you’re casually sending pics to your therapist whenever. But since the relationship is so new it would have been better to ask regardless.