I 25(F) met this guy at work 25(M)..we hit bit off and started dating early November of 2025..everything has been great..
Now to my question..WIBTA if I still went out with my workmates tonight( he won’t be joining us) for a game and quiz night after him refusing me?
NTA
Don’t ever let a man control what you do.
NTA…is he your dad? you are a grown adult and can have a night out with your friends without his consent.
ESH
If I’m understanding this correctly, you’re in a new relationship with a “nice guy” who told you not to go out with your friends and you wanna know if you should….
If your bf “refused you” then you need to dump him. Not one single adult in this world gets to tell you what to do. You’re 25, you don’t need his permission. By letting him (and anyone else) think you need his permission you’re being an asshole to yourself.
Nta. It’s a 3 month relationship and he doesn’t own you. You have every right to go out.
He shouldn’t have been in a position to “refuse you” in the first place?
I think that being clear about who has the right to decide what is really helpful for any relationship.
Who has the right to decide what you eat, where you go, what you do?
Who has the right to allocate your resources (time, effort, money)?
These decision are inherently yours. You might want to consider the impact of your decisions on other people, but these are ultimately your decisions.
Be careful about ceding your decision-making power to other people. There are good reasons to do that: for example, it’s fairly normal to sell some of your time and effort to an employer in exchange for money.
Your boyfriend should not have the decision-making power over whether you go out for a trivia night or not.
Nta, I would be single the moment a man told me he is not allowing me to go out. That controlling behaviour is not okey. He can tell me his conserns but never flat out not allow me something like this.
NTA
How is this even a question? Why would you need permission to go out ?
Go out with your friends. Break up with the guy you’ve only known for 3 months who thinks he gets to control what you do. NTA.
NTA
It could be considered courtesy to let him know you are going out with coworkers.
He doesn’t get to ‘allow’ you to go. He is not your parent, owner or boss to be giving consent for you to do something.
Added note – not so sure I’d be dating at work. That gets messy. You’re only a couple of months in. Just saying
Why do you need his consent?
Nta
NTA on principle alone. You can go out whenever you want.
Can you please clarify what “refuse me” means? Is there more to this story?
You’ve been dating this guy for three whole months and you’re already letting him dictate where you can go and what you can do? Girl, what.
You are NTA but you are in dire need of therapy, apparently.
He “refused” you…? You mean you asked permission to go out…?