Me as a 20 year old male turning 21 soon is celebrating my birthday with a friend because we’re turning 21. We’re hosting a pregame the night before at our apartment when the bars are popping because who wouldn’t want to go out on their 21st ( we would be turning 21 once it hits the next day at the bar) I was originally asked by her straight up saying could I celebrate this with a cake on y’all’s birthday first off? I thought who cares let the girl have fun then I got to thinking and talking to my female friend also turning 21 we both decided to talk to her and tell her we really don’t want this happening on our 21st because that’s a milestone. I can legally drink.
We sat down and talked to her and she said OK fuck y’all in this birthday we were all gonna wear colored bobs and matching colored sunglasses. Am I the asshole for not inviting her to my birthday anymore because she wanted to take over the celebration and got mad that we did not want her to celebrate her celibacy streak.
Why the fuck would she care that much about celebrating a 6 month celibacy streak? That’s not a thing…If she wants to mark the moment she can have a little toast or something but insisting on having a cake on someone else’s 21st birthday and then bailing when they say no is…embarrassing for her. NTA
Yeah people usually start at 1 year tbh
I tried reasoning with her but she doesn’t understand why being celibate shouldn’t be something to celebrate
It can be something to celebrate but def doesn’t take priority over a 21st bday
Exactly. It’s fine to celebrate but it’s not even a year…it’s literally 6 months? Why would that be more important than two people turning 21.
Not only is it not a thing that needs a celebration, it ABSOLUTELY does not supersede a birthday. She sounds like an attention-seeking disaster. I’m betting this is far from the first time she’s tried to make everything about her. You are definitely NTA.
Yeah, I don’t get it. Why celebrate it at all?
Yeah. She should also celebrate 47th and 92th day of celibacy. Why those two? Because pulled from ass just like 6 month celibacy
Sounds like she either wanted all the attention or an excuse to drink again. NTA
Celibacy, ie: no sex. Not sober
Not at all, remember it’s your party and you can cry if you want 2 but she sounds like hard work. Do what you have planned and enjoy your birthday 🎂
Nope, send her packing. Sounds like she has main character syndrome. nta
NTA
I read this as sobriety at first and was really confused why y’all would hate on her for being sober and deciding to have cake instead, honestly, but after realizing it was celibacy I have no idea why she would think it would be fine to overshadow your 21st birthday like that.
Like good for her if she’s so proud about it, but that has nothing to do with you.
NTA – have her host her own sexless party, the idea of making your birthday the staging ground for this creepy (American?) behaviour is a bit demented.