A bit of backstory. I (31 F) left home young, worked, traveled, never had kids, and maintained a great deal of independence and financial freedom. In contrast, my family is just getting on their feet.
I moved back home during the pandemic and worked to help myself and the rest of my family obtain better jobs/education/financial benefits/homeownership/medical care. My youngest sibling (27 F) did not take advantage of these opportunities in the same way as our parents and siblings and remains financially dependent on others.
Last year I agreed to rent my house to my sister and her friend for cheap with the agreed expectation that my sister would be actively working toward purchasing the house. Just before signing the lease she reveals she is pregnant and the boyfriend needs to move in too.
Since then it has been one thing after another. When she named the godmother (another sister) she insinuated that because I travel a lot that makes me unstable so I couldn’t be a godmother. When I didn’t react the way she wanted me to she started demanding I pay for repairs and renovations around the house that weren’t standard. She uninvited me from her baby shower. Then her boyfriend and her friend started texting me one month after the other that they’d be late on rent.
I feel she is using her pregnancy to manipulate and avoid responsibility. It hurts my feelings to be on bad terms with my sister but I feel like I have given more than enough.
When their lease is up I will be putting the house on the market. I’ve maintained that they have the first option to purchase, but I will not renew. Am I the asshole?
NTA. You were clear as to what your expectations of this arrangement would be. Being consistently late on rent alone would be enough reason to not renew.
NTA. She made you the butt of the joke multiple times. Once? Maybe awkward. Repeatedly? That’s intentional. You removed yourself instead of escalating. That’s actually the mature move.
And folks this is why you don’t financially support anyone but you’re self and your own kids especially when it comes to family it’s a definite no been down this path before and I will never do it again for anyone.
Nta. In all honesty…I’d check your laws and if it’s ok I’d put the house up for sale next month. They can either buy it, deal with a new landlord, or move out. Their choice.
No, you are NTA, not at all. They can either buy the place (with a regular mortgage, not financing by you) or they can find somewhere else to live.
NTA. Given all the context, you should probably not even give them the option to buy. Why? Because they will either be looking for a steep discount, or, should any issues arise with house after purchase, you will never hear the end of it.
I would let the lease end, sell the house, and move on.
You can put it up for sale now and terminate the lease, provided there is one. If there isn’t, I’d start the eviction process now cuz it takes a while
\*Reads Title\*
Okay probably TA
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NTA & Evict her ass.
NTA they are always late on rent so are g keeping up their side if the lease. Give them 30 days notice (or whatever it is in your area) and put the house on the market.
NTA – you need to completely untangle your finances from her. She had her chance.
NTA but your sister is a manipulative user. I hope it’s as smooth of an eviction as possible. You don’t owe her anything.
NTA its a important lesson of you never do business with family
NTA they played a really stupid game and won nuclear prizes! Also they are manipulating you because they can. Just evict them. Be prepared they will destroy your home before you move out. Best get a independent evaluater, photograph and video everything and mentioned to them that, the person is coming over to check for renovations. Im sure they will automatically cooperate.
NTA.
Never mix family/friends and business. Someone will generally have stupid expectations or take advantage. Not always but more often than not.
Your sister seems to be trying to push your buttons and your lack of interest in retaliating is annoying her. That’s a her problem.
Get legal advice and proceed with the sale asap.