This happened a couple of years ago at a theatre in London, but it’s been on my mind ever since so I need to ask you guys. My girlfriend and I went to the theatre, and we were sat second row from the back, up in the gods, and it’s a steep theatre so you’re looking down at the stage. The first half of the show, we had no one in front of us, three empty seats. At the interval, three people came in and sat in these seats, and the guy sat in front of my girlfriend had a huge afro, and I’m not being dramatic when I say it was a foot wide and a foot tall. Unfortunately due to the pitch of the theatre seats, this guy’s hair completely obscured her view of the stage, and the girl sat behind us. The couple behind us were moaning like stink, my girlfriend was also quite annoyed, so I decided to mention it to him, very politely I thought. Along the lines of "Hey man, I’m really sorry, but I just need to let you know that you’re hair is blocking the two people behind you from seeing the stage" to which he replied quite bluntly along the lines of ‘not sure what you want me to do about that?’, to which I agreed and said I didn’t know what the answer was, but if we can try and work something out that would be great and then we can all enjoy the show. After this request he agreed and was really nice about it, and said he had no problem with swapping with the couple at the back (the moaning ones) so we can all enjoy it. I turned to the couple at the back, who then refused to swap, told him that he’d paid for his seat so has every right to sit there, and that they wouldn’t swap, then looked at me like I was scum of the earth. Now I should point out that I am 6ft5 so I knew that the guys hair wouldn’t be as much of a problem for me,
so I asked my girlfriend to swap seats with me, then she could see, I could see if I sat up straight and looked over his hair (not the most comfortable but it worked), but unfortunately it would block the girl behind me’s view even more, which it did and she continued to moan like stink, only this time about me. I enjoyed the show. Am I the asshole here, A. for speaking to the guy about his hair, and B. for sitting in front of the girl and blocking her view more?
NTA- You tried to make it work politely. He didn’t seem bothered by it, and tried to work with you.
The couple behind you seem to be the AHs here.
This happened years ago. It’s been resolved.
NTA. Might’ve been slightly more polite to go in with the switcharoony offer in the first place but it sounds like a reasonable attempt at problem solving. The couple behind you sound pretty pesty though. You can lead a horse to water..
Some people, like the couple in back, just aren’t happy unless they have something to complain about, which is probably why they refused to actually solve their problem. You could give a glass of water to someone like that and they would complain that it’s too wet.
NTA. You were brilliant!
The guy with the Afro was willing to switch seats. The woman behind you wasn’t. You gallantly swapped seats with your girlfriend and solved the problem. Too bad the woman now behind you could no longer see.
NAH. You tried to find a solution but the woman behind you was unwilling to cooperate. The woman behind you was inflexible but it was her seat. The guy with the afro or any other hairdo was nicer than he needed to be. So hairdos aren’t so easily adjustable and I wouldn’t have been so willing to rearrange mine so why should he. He was entitled to wearing his hair undisturbed as the woman behind you was entitled to sit in her assigned seat undisturbed—maybe more so.
The thing to do in that situation is to speak with an usher or theatre attendant. They usually know of a vacant seat or two that usually offers a better option.
INFO – Why couldn’t he have changed seats with you instead of the couple behind you?
This is a great question which hadn’t actually occurred to me until I was writing my post. If I were to guess, I would say after the girls reaction we were both taken aback and decided to just shut the discussions down altogether
NTA
No big hairstyles at seated theatre events. He should have tied it back for the show.
You did literally all you could, and in the best way
He’ll get it cut when Man U win five games on the bounce.
He sounds like he was chill about it.
But I think the lesson here is mot to champion other people’s moans.
I’d be more embarrassed over raising the issue and their refusing to take the solution.
And who only shows up for the second half of a theatre performance?
NTA girl behind you was one. But I’d have swapped seats with him. Then you’re both comfortable and she still can’t see