So, for context I am 21F the friends are Jax (21f) and Sam (20 nonbinary)
Sam and I have been friends since 2022 high school friends and me and Jax were friends since 2024 after I graduated, I blocked Jax once before due to her making a post about me belittling me while I was going through a rough spot and mentioned being a wedding planner instead of a brides made was way too stressful. I leaned on Jax when I had no one else to lean onto and we hung out every weekend which impacted me working to move out. I was encouraged by Sam to get back into contact with Jax and to not believe what I’ve experienced and that she wasn’t talking about me badly while not in contact. So, I found her post about me apologizing for being the terrible friend she thought of me as and that I let my controlling parents’ control me when I could leave. She was ok with this apology and then a few months after I congratulated her on her wedding, she sent me a post calling me her friend on TikTok. The video stated "friends who dance together stay together" referring back to when I was an exotic dancer with her. I was happy and asked if we could hang and smoke if she thought of me as such, she said yes and plans were never made, I’d ask maybe once a month knowing life is busy and always when I got a fresh stash so I could roll for her.
Sam however was having issues with their birthday like I do when it comes to having people show up for them, I ask if we could plan something and shot her a happy birthday text, they thanked me and said that they weren’t planning anything I said ok but to let me know if plans chang because they were such a cool friend. A few months later I lose a friend and then a grandparent a week later come to find out if was the same week she lost her grandfather and that weekend she posts a story saying thank you to those who were there for me, I immediately feel bad and shoot her a text apologizing and hopping their ok and holding on not mentioning I lost anyone so I didn’t make it about me. They accepted the apology and hoped it didn’t affect our friendship. I said it didn’t and hoped the same. A month later after Them and Jax were posting sly comments about me, I confronted them both. They played it off and I believed it for about two months; my final straw was them belittling me finding Christ again after about 6 years of falling from the church. I texted Jax because she seemed like the one with the biggest issue with how I’m living my life. Telling me about people I told her I didn’t care to hear about. Jax pushed this aside and made me seem like the issue for following Christ and my opinions on why I don’t care to hear about them. I then sent her a voice message stating her and Sam talking trash behind my back isn’t ok and that they are no longer welcome in my life, blocked them both and moved on. My sister last month texted me to tell me Jax is still really upset and posting about me still on the internet, so AITA???
1 – You’re too old for this high school drama.
2 – “I was encouraged by Sam to \[…\] not believe what I’ve experienced” Girl that is a huge red flags. Real friends don’t tell you to not believe the things you literally actually experienced.
NTA. Move on from these people. You deserve better friends.
I see that and am both disappointed in me trusting Sam more then my experience with Jax and how she handles fallouts with friends 😅😅
Your title and your story don’t really go together. Also your story says a whole lot of nothing, seriously that’s a lot of text to say nothing.
Fs I both see and don’t see that I just had to do what I could with the word count I had along with following the rules 😅 the sly comments would’ve gotten me banned and went past the word count. I also know my actions could’ve been the issue so I highlighted those more then their words because I don’t like dragging people for things they may have said in anger or while going through it, but appreciate the criticism and will work on trying to be more detailed on what the other person did as well do it’s not lacking the context that may be more needed
ESH. Y’all aren’t friends. Y’all are just emotional dumping grounds for each other.
Hence why I didn’t want to be friends with her anymore and now Sam I appreciate this and will make be making sure I shut down anyone or my sister if they try to talk about people I’m no longer talking to I appreciate this
ESH because you’ve obviously grown apart and are making it each other’s ongoing problem.
Let the friendship go. If you travel in the same circles and see these people regularly, you can treat them like a colleague with basic courtesy and no expectations.
Fs will definitely be telling my sister from here on out to not tell me if she’s talking about me even though I have her blocked her I appreciate that sm! My sister bringing that to my attention made me feel like I had to make a post to figure out if and how I was in the wrong