So I (22m) live with brother (21m) in a small apartment, we’re both Uni students. Our next door neighbours are a family that has an autistic child (the child sometimes yells, but it doesn’t bother us and they seem like good people, they warned us, and it’s not easy for them etc.)
So one Sunday I decide to invite a childhood friend of mine (22m) for a beer, happens once a month.
My brother goes out to talk to his girlfriend (they’re long distance on the phone).
I am aware of the importance of not making noise not to cause embarrasing situations and I’ve thus mostly been careful not to play music too loud so far. My friend and I play it on the speaker quietly and chat. I am not drinking at all and I am sober (I got completely wasted 2 days prior so there is not any need to, waste of time) I have terribly dramatic reactions to alcohol.
My brother walks in at around 9:00 pm and joins us, he starts saying that he’ll get drunk. I knew what was up exactly at that moment, he’s probably broken up with his girlfriend.
After a beer, he admits to me and my friend what had happened – I had sensed correctly.
He got extremely drunk and I didn’t stop him. He started dancing around and singing loudly, it was quite entertaining, honestly, been there done that… But the second he starts singing to loudly, i tell him to quiet down, several times.
An hour later, we’re still sort of having fun, I mean it did get a bit boring for me seeing my obliterated brother making a fool fo himself, but alright. In the whole situation I try to avoid him hurting himself etc. My friend starts flickering the lights to the music, I do that, and he records my brother dancing in the light. I do too, I won’t send it to anyone, but maybe my brother.
One moment, My friend started playing the music a bit too loud and my brother let loose, at one point a chair fell, moments later, our doorbell rings – the mother of the family is there, just as I had expected (guess I got to caught up in the situation and forgot to tell him to be quieter, although I told him several times, but he’s wasted!)
She showed me that according to the rules of the building (on the wall in the hallway) that from 10pm onwards, it’s supposed to be quiet. I apologize and say it’s my fault for being the only one sober to stop it and not being persistent enough. I go back in and shut the music down.
I am ashamed and embarrassed, we’re terrible! Immature brats! I had history of making a fool of myself, but I feel like I failed here, maybe it was my resposibility to actually prevent what I genuinely expected to happen, I’ve always worried not to get somebody knocking on my door because of noise.
A bit simplified, but oh well… It’s late…
I’m gonna say yta but it looks like you know that. Just remember in the future that you are living in a building with others with clearly stated rules. Also being that loud past 10pm in a building like that is just a bad move anyway. Looks like you’ll know better next time
Yeah, the frustrating this is I knew, and I am pretty sure I had been really careful till this, I am constantly the one warning about it and did so, although only verbally, this time. I am definitely guilty, but it feels frustrating that it wouldn’t have happened without my drunk brother…
Hey we all make mistakes and I think this post was more you looking for someone to confirm what you knew. Remember, mistakes are fine, it’s how you use these mistakes is what counts
Thanks!
i honestly think you’re TA in this as it was something you and your companions could’ve controlled, as opposed to the neighbors with their autistic child. it can get hard to control kids with autism, but for you guys, you’re pretty much aware of the consequences of your actions. but it’s nothing a little apology can’t fix:)
Yeah, will knock on their door with a gift and an apology. Although, I feel like I was the quiet one and my brother should applogize, I already have immediately, I am not excusing myself entirrly being sober and all, but still, maybe a tad unfair and unlucky… I should be more decisive and trust my gut, not only verbally ..