So my sister and I are both in the same grade. However, I am older than her, and I have my full license. She is of age to get her license but for some reason doesn’t. I don’t know if she doesn’t want to, or if my parents don’t want her to, whatever. She doesn’t have her license but is able to get it.
Some background: I am a straight A student that is the president and leader of multiple clubs and community organization. I’ve also had a job since middle school. I do many more things but that’s just a quick sum of it all. My sister on the other hand isn’t as “self-motivated” or “self accomplished” as I am. She doesn’t go to clubs in the morning or work after school. She also doesn’t take any APs/Honors/Dual Enrollment/Language, etc like I do. Therefore she doesn’t really have a lot of HW or work to do in the morning. I do.
Basically, my mom thinks because we are both going to the same place, I should just bring her. But I don’t want to. My commutes to and from school are often my only time where I can just vibe and listen to music by myself because I’m usually going to sports and/or work afterschool. (After i go home to change and get work stuff) Therefore I don’t want someone else in my car, unless they are a close friend who I can vibe with. I also don‘t want to drive her because she CAN get her license. She could have gotten it months ago but for some unknown reason, she hasn’t. Also, she usually gets picked up by her boyfriend after she gets home, so it’s not like she is going to work or anything really “important.” AITAH for not wanting to drive my sister to and from school?
**I paid for my car 100%, and pay for all the gas, repairs, etc.**
**My mom bought my sister a car but she can’t drive it because she doesn’t have a license.**
**Edit: Just to clarify, I am only a few months older than her as we don’t share the same biological parents.**
Yes. Your desire to vibe isn’t as important as helping your parents and sister out.
Also, if you didn’t buy your car you’re a major asshole.
YTA. Drive your fucking sister to school
YTA. It’s literally not out of the way to take your little sister to and from school. You guys start and end at the same time.
Your family affords you being in clubs / sports / extracurricular and your car, phone… for you to not do a simple errand? You sound a bit spoiled, in my opinion. You can help your sister.
Yta, if your colloquial shit is as together as you seem to think it is then you should be able to work out some vibe time, while also managing to take your sister to school like a normal decent person. Youre a high school student, not a fricking diplomat for christs sake.
YTA.
Yes, I know you paid for your own car. But guess what? Even if you pay for insurance, you are still on your parent’s policy because you are underage and can’t legally sign documents by yourself.
So suck it up until you’re an adult and can be independent. Use this time to get closer to your sister.
Yeah YTA. You can prefer she’s not there but actually refusing to when you’re going to the same place is just pig headed.
If she’s going at a different time then she should obviously either get herself home or wait until you’re going, so it shouldn’t affect your clubs and all that.
Info- if you’re older and a such spectacular overachiever and your sister is such an underachiever, how are you all in the same grade?
Also wondering about this. And piggybacking on your comment to say:
OP, it sounds like you really look down on your sister for not being an overachiever like yourself. What you can’t see at your age, is that often times, when kids struggle to achieve (your sister?), there’s an underlying issue. Can be trauma, mental illness,, social deficits, undiagnosed learning disorders, to list a few.
Maybe you should give her the ride, just because it’s the logical thing to do, and try to connect with her and inspire/help her. If your only time to yourself is your commutes, you’re overworking yourself and you need to rebalance. You may not burn out now, but you’ll burn out in your 20’s and it’ll be harder to manage.
TL;DR Girl just be nice and give her the damn ride. You need to redistribute your time if your only decompression time is your commute
YTA. Majorly. And all the complaints about her so-called “lack of motivation” are meaningless. You included them only to make yourself look good and get people to think less of your sister.
Even if your sister had her license, it would be a waste of money and resources for you to both drive to the same place at the same time every day.
You may have paid for your car and your fuel, but you don’t pay for the insurance which is necessary. You also don’t pay for all your other expenses. You were only able to purchase the car in the first place because you had the support of your parents to be able to work from a young age.
Stop being an AH and take your sister with you to the same place you are going.
So you go on about all this community service and activities that you do, and you can’t bring yourself to give your sister a ride to the same school you’re going to? Way to really give back lol. YTA
YTA not for the car but for feeling you’re better than your sister because of different interests and courses.
Tbh, ESH.
You: You guys are going to the same place at the same time. I like vibing in the car with my music too, but it’s ridiculous to not take her if you’re literally going to the same place at the same time. Also, even if she did drive it would be a waste of gas and environmentally harmful for you two to not carpool unless you had different schedules that day.
Your mom: Even though you work it’s kinda unfair you have to pay for more stuff than your sister does just because she chooses not to work.
Your sister: Unless she has a fear of driving, it sounds like she’s just being lazy by not getting her license when she ha a car. Also, if her bf picks her up after school why can’t he just take her home or they just go out straight after school?
NAH.
Look, I get needing your own space and time alone, 100%. My car was my only real space that was completely mine for a long time when I was younger.
But unless she’s making you late often or otherwise being a major inconvenience, it doesn’t sound like there’s a good enough reason to not do it.
I’d just make sure everyone is on the same page as far as your car, your rules, though. If she’s making you late or otherwise interfering with your schedule, or leaving messes, messing with the radio, etc. she can find her own ride. That would be the norm for anyone.
YTA.
You’re going to school.
She’s going to school.
Your reasoning is absolutely ridiculous. You think you’re better than her because of the activities and whatnot you’re involved in. You’re not.
You need to remember that it doesn’t matter who paid for the car. Driving is a privilege, not a right. This means your parents can take your keys and tell you you’re not allowed to drive until your conceited behind starts driving your sister to school as well.