I have 2 roommates and we rotate every week in who throws out the trash. The girl who made the list is hypocritical and controlling and is always on me about throwing it out at very specific times but she is completely okay with the fact that the other girl who is her friend forgets to throw it out every week.
Both of them are bullies, insanely rude and unhygienic. Trash Leader has made rude comments in the group chat. Yesterday I went downstairs and saw that Trash Leader has not taken out the trash which has been piling up for the last 3 days in her week. I texted in the gc and said very neutrally that the trash still hasn’t been taken out and I would not be taking it out if the person who’s week it is does not.
Why should I??? You clearly see it’s full and your dishes are in the sink so I know you see it! I am not taking out trash you purposely left for me. I hear her tip toe down the stairs and wash her dishes and then she goes back up. In the morning she sends a rude message stating it wasn’t full when she went downstairs (which is obviously a lie bc how else would your dishes have magically been washed? And I sent the message at 11:30 pm and she went down at 12:30 am) and that I’m trying to “shirk my responsibilities”. I sent a photo of the trash and blocked them both. Now the trash is overflowing but I won’t be throwing it out. Am I in the wrong?
YTA – stop being so petty and throw the trash out, who cares who’s week it is?
NTA, If it’s her week, it’s her responsibility. You’re not the household backup janitor just because she slacks. Boundaries are boundaries.
Thank you!!!
NTA, you’re not wrong about the trash but you escalated the situation by blocking them.
How so?
NTA. Of course you shouldn’t throw the trash out on someone else’s week! And let them know that if it piles up to your week, you will only take out the new trash. Don’t block them though, they’ll use it as an excuse. Tell everyone that 1) old trash can attract roaches and rats 2) you think whoever’s week it is to take out the trash should do so. And then let everything play out. You’re in a rough situation with bullies, and hopefully can get out in 7 months. Don’t speak about the trash again. Let it pile up.
Yeah! I added a new bag so all the new trays can go in there but I’m not taking out the full bins. There are 3 of them she left for me and she’s acting like she didn’t see it
NTA, it’s not your week than don’t take it out, wait until it’s your week to take it if it’s still there so you won’t come out as the petty one, and I would suggest implicate subtly that she’s immature and try to talk to them both how to redo this chores system.
She does this every week. I am refusing to throw it out this time. It’s been a year
I’m very petty, I would throw it in her room, stop doing my other chores and start trying to move out, but don’t recommend it, so in this case you can let it build up, at some point one of them will give up.
NTA. If it’s her week, it’s her job. They can’t enforce rules on you and then ignore them themselves. You sent a reminder, they chose to leave it. Stand your ground and start looking for new roommates if you can, this won’t get better.
I can tell by the way this is written (and because you immediately argued with the one person so far who said YTA) that you are 100% certain that you are not the AH. So why are you asking?
Take out the overflowing trash. Remove the trash bags. See how they respond. Next step is to remove the trash bin. See how they respond.