My mother recently decided she was going to cheat on my stepdad and be missing for almost a week and lie to most of us. Made us worried. We found that out after she got back home. My stepdads family is pissed. Rightfully so. I’m pissed, literally everyone’s pissed. Things were said that some people are having a hard time forgiving my mom (fine because I don’t blame them) and need time. I myself got myself into some trouble recently. I’m still dealing with it. I’m refusing to go to their thanksgiving thing and going to the thing that I’m related to by blood because it’s less stress for me. I know if I show up I’m going to get berated about my mother, someone’s going to say something bad about my mom (which in part I’ll defend until I can’t because again, I’m still pissed at her for the cheating), as well as be told about myself for the trouble I got myself into. I’ve been barely talking to people, taking my own time to deal with what I have going on as well as try to be there for my mom and stepdad hoping things will be alright, but I can’t really guarantee they will. But that’s not my relationship. What happened, happened and nothing I can do. But AITA for not going, and even distancing myself?
NTA. It’s important for us to set boundaries and assess what is important to us for our own mental health. Living up to others’ expectations in order to please them, while going against our own well being, is unhealthy but it’s often something that we were taught to do as kids “to get along”. Do what you think it right for you.