So to start off I (33M) have not been working this year due to illness and my partner (40F) and roommate (44M) have really stepped up and gotten things paid for. He’s a nice guy and we’ve lived together for 3 years and part of the arrangement is that his kid is allowed to stay with us sometimes. All well and good but his kid likes to play with poop. It’s been 3 years of finding small spots and sometimes larger spot of shit around my bathroom. We have had talks about it and even keep wipes just for them to clean the bathroom but it’s an ongoing situation and now that his kid is also using an electric toothbrush the mess is ridiculous. I want to ask them to move out but I feel like that’d put unnecessary burden on his family and mine, but I can’t keep living with poop surprises. Any thoughts would be great because I feel like I’ve asked too many times.
UPDATE: I have worked since I was 14, days nights weekends and holidays and recently as a para with special needs kids but this year I came down with something incurable so no I can not just make money. Yes his kid is special needs but he’s also a teenager who is capable of more than his parents put on him. What I’m told by his dad is that when he goes back to his moms she does not make him do anything and cleans up for him. Anytime I have asked him to clean he does it hastily and without complaint. It’s a small 10×10 room and I am just sick of finding poop on my shower head, light switch and other places.
ESH. Start paying your own bills, and then you can start complaining.
Is there something wrong with the child?
The kid is obviously a minimum of 3 years of age, given that the arrangement has been in place for 3 years.
Why is roommate letting the child use the bathroom alone? The kid is obviously either not emotionally mature enough to NOT smear shit everywhere, or wants the attention – having daddy in there will put a stop to shit-smearing, and also give kid attention, so whatever is causing the problem, it should help.
I can understand that you need this roommate’s money, so don’t let the kid use the bathroom without daddy, and don’t babysit.
NTA, but this situation makes me uneasy, there’s something deeply psychological involved and I really don’t like it. Best of luck OP!
I think your powers are limited since you’re not paying the rent
Info: Have ya’ll thought of moving out? Let me quote you:
>I want to ask them to move out but I feel like that’d put unnecessary burden on his family and mine
At that point, why not just fix the problem and move out yourselves?
Adding – whose house is it? are you sharing a lease? We’re lacking some info here.
You need to have a chat with him about cleaning up after his child. If the child is known to have issues with poop, he should be going in the bathroom after every visit and inspecting, cleaning.
Hes been covering bills while you don’t work for a year? Thats his place ypure staying in. If you don’t like it, you move out.
YTA