So I (24) F, went to see my, lets say her name is Ria, to perform her theatre show in our local theatre. And our circle of friends was going as well, and we wanted to see her perform so we could support her.
She’s not the main role so she doesn’t really have that many scenes but, she does have one solo song in the whole show and I was hoping that all of us would cheer her on, but when her turn finally came up, I heard my friends whispering and giggling about a cute guy in the ensemble instead of focusing on our friend Ria, and didn’t even talk about how good she did during her part.
After act 1, during the intermission, they didn’t even bother to bring her up and talk about how good she was and instead were still talking about the cute guy. Now heres where I thought I was the asshole, I interrupted their conversation and said “So…are we not gonna talk about how good Ria did, or are we just gonna focus on the guy we barely even know?”. After that they just laughed it off, and began talking about Ria after I mentioned it, but overall it was still pretty awkward until the intermission had ended.
I feel like I came off as too dramatic? Or maybe aggressive? But I’m not sure…so, AITA??
NTA. Good on you for pointing out how weird their behavior was considering y’all were there for Ria. Nothing wrong with talking about cute guys (or other people), but when it takes over the whole evening or gathering… that’s when I’d get annoyed too!
And let me let you in on a lil secret: it’s not bad if social things sometimes turn awkward. Some things need to be said and it will create an awkward atmosphere. But then people will reflect/process and then the awkwardness goes away. Just because it gets awkward, doesn’t mean you did anything wrong.
Awkwardness is a natural response when people feel called out, that doesn’t immediately make it bad. It doesn’t sound like you were rude or aggressive, just direct, and that’s fine (though directness can be frowned upon, kinda depends on culture, but I’m Dutch and we’re generally very direct lol)
Yeah exactly, sometimes a little awkwardness is worth it to make sure your friend actually gets the recognition they deserve.
They were just chatting and having fun, you can’t control what people find interesting. YTA.
She can’t control what people find interesting, but talking *during a play* is an asshole move, regardless of the conversation topic. Especially if it’s your friend’s show, that’s just so disrespectful to them, the other performers, and the rest of the audience. If they were only talking about the guy during intermission and not the actual show you would have a point, but this is just an issue of their friends not having any basic theater etiquette or respect for others.
Nta. You’re a good friend. OP, and your friends are too old to be fucking boy-crazy. Good for you for telling them what they needed to hear. Maybe it will stick with at least one of them.
NTA full stop
What kind of people talk through their friend’s performance because of a cute guy they saw? There’s plenty of time to talk about him during the intermission instead of DURING THE PLAY.
Besides, it’s also just common curtesy to keep silent during a play as a show of respect to the performers and also to everyone around you so not only were they being disrespectful in general but also specifically towards the person you all came to see in the first place!
You were completely right to check their behaviour and try and redirect the conversation, maybe it was a bit dramatic and maybe you did ruin the mood and make it awkward but they needed to hear that, please don’t feel bad about it!
They should put themselves in Ria’s shoes and think about how they would feel if they were performing and all their friends could talk about was how cute they found one of the guys in their cast
NTA
NAH
They didn’t perceive this social gathering the same way you did, but they did get your point after you mentioned it and focused back on what’s important to your friend. They’re fine.
Despite what you said at the end, you managed to make a remark in an effective way without attacking them. It worked, since they didn’t get upset and got your point and the gathering kept going on with a nice tone.
And now your friend has friends who paid attention and will be glad.
Success all over lol
👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻
NTA your guys were there to support your friend, not guy shopping/oogling.