There is this girl who was in two of my college classes who I had chatted with earlier in the year, one time just briefly for a group project, and another time she came up to me a few minutes after I started walking back from class. That time she came up to me, I was extremely nervous and awkward because this kind of thing never happens to me (male or female). From what I remember it wasn’t a great conversation and I figured I scared her off.
Fast forward a few months to this Tuesday. After not talking to her for all this time, she decided to come up to talk with me again after class. I have gained a lot of confidence since then and I thought we had a great little conversation. We chatted for like a minute about how she had dropped one of the classes we were both in and plans to take it again another time. We had to part ways and I asked her where she was headed. She said that she was going back to her dorm. She started talking about how it’s so great with a balcony and projector for movies, then she asked for my number saying I should come over sometime.
I texted her about an hour later saying that I take her up on her offer, and she texted back around the same time the next day that I’m welcome anytime but she hosts movie nights sometime which she could tell me when they are happening. I replied saying that I would be interested in watching something at her dorm at some point. She has not gotten back to me.
I saw her again in class today but she didn’t look like she had any interest in talking to me before or after. I wish I knew what was going on in her head but I just want to know what I can do so I can navigate this.
Any experts here on Schoolyard issues?
She probably smashing someone else higher than you on the options list. Once she gets back down to you he will hit you up again 👍
Bro tf even is this take.
Either that or she ran out of car warranties to sell.
Sounds like she has been extending herself with you but you have not warmed up from her perspective. Hopefully it’s not too late. Ask her when is the next movie night, or see if she wants to grab coffee sometime.
Don’t be friends with chicks you like man that’s a recipe for disaster.
Friendships should feel natural in how to evolve, not with a fixed strategic planning.. Also is it friendship you are after? You mention nowhere that you might be interested in her romantically, but I get the sense there is more interest from you than just being a friend, and if that is the case, presenting yourself as a friend and not a man that has an interest in her might hurt your chances in the long run.
You’re not getting mixed signals; you’re just dealing with normal college-level chaos. She asked for your number and invited you over, so clearly there’s interest.
Slow replies usually mean she’s busy, not avoiding you. Be friendly in class, keep it casual, and let her follow up about the movie night. You didn’t mess anything up; you’re doing fine.
Of course he’s probably getting some mixed signals. The important thing is to back off. If she seems standoffish, then mirror it by being equally non-interactive. Don’t go awkwardly out of your way to avoid her, but if it’s open seating then don’t sit by her, maybe sit in her peripheral vision about 5-10 seats away if possible, but don’t sit right behind or beside her. DON’T LOOK AT HER.
Basically let her make the next move. If she doesn’t text or interact with you in 10 days, send her a text about “hey, didn’t you say something about a movie night”. If that gets a tepid response, well, it’s over.
>I saw her again in class today but she didn’t look like she had any interest in talking to me before or after.
Just message her what she’s up to and if she wants to eat? I don’t understand the problem
She digs you dude. Just ask to get coffee or goto the cafeteria.
It’s possible she is interested in you. Quite bold for a woman to approach you like that and take your number. It is also not impossible, she really meant what she said: that she is hosting movie nights and (simply) wants ppl to join, so in that case it might simply be platonic interest.
It’s also not impossible she is interetsed, then succumbed to mindfuck and feared being too forward and quickly added that it’s just general movie nights she invited you to, and feared you might get the impression she is into you.
I wouldn’t do anything else now, I would consider this mixed signals. You texted her, and you said you’d like to meet her, you even said you’d join the movie nights. I’d wait and see if there is anything else coming from her.