AITAH for refusing to help my friend (35F) pack because I was tired? She sent me a nasty text calling me “ungrateful.”

I (24F) have a close university friend (35F). Recently, things have been tense between us, and we haven’t spoken in a week. I need some outside perspective because her latest text is making me second-guess myself.

She recently moved to another city for work and asked me to help her pack. On the day she asked, I was physically and mentally exhausted and didn’t have the energy, so I declined. I didn’t think it would be a huge deal, but she took it very personally. After I said no, she sent me a text basically saying that she has always been there for me, but when she asked for "something as simple as help packing," I couldn’t be bothered because I was "tired". She called me ungrateful and said she didn’t expect this from me.

I admit, she has been a good friend emotionally. She supported me through an argument with my boyfriend and once waited with me in the ER for hours when I was injured; she even took off from work for it. I am truly grateful for that.

However, she is 11 years older than me, but I often feel like her mom. She had some family issues back in September and needed to move out of her home ASAP. She decided to move to my city. Because the situation was urgent and she lived an hour away, I stepped up and did almost all the legwork. I viewed places for her, and she even made me make the final decision on which place to rent. She constantly asks me to do small, simple tasks that she could easily Google for. I’m talking about renewing a railcard, checking visa info, or looking up addresses. Also, we travelled together this year, and I had to book every flight and plan every single itinerary. What really grinds my gears is that she won’t even open Google Maps to navigate. She relies on me to lead her everywhere.

I don’t mind helping, but it’s reached a point where I feel like an unpaid personal assistant. I’ve tried teaching her how to do these things, but she refuses to learn. So when she asked me to pack, I hesitated. I feel like I’ve already done so much to help her settle here, and I was genuinely tired. But her text is making me feel guilty, like I’m ignoring all the emotional support she gave me in the past.

AITAH for drawing a line this time? Or am I really being ungrateful?

PS: We both just graduated with our Master’s degrees, and she was actually the first one to secure a full-time job. And before asking me to pack, she has again asked me to help her find a place in the new city she is moving to (just like I did for her current place).