Throwaway account for privacy.
I, (30M straight) and my since childhood friend (31M"Phil"straight), was watching the movie Call Me By Your Name, after our shared friend (30F"Jill") had told us she liked it (while giggling like a kid).
We always jokingly pick at eachother so me and Phil decided to watch the movie so we could have more tools in our belt to pick at her and joke about specific scenes (we didn´t know anything about the movie at the time and thought it would be a straight cheezy love story with a conventionally attractive guy that Jill probably swooned over – perfect for playful joking from our part.)
Fast forward to thursday night, when my wife (28F"Kate") had a 3+ hour wine and pottery class with her mother and older sister, that they have had to cancel 2 times before due too schedule changes (her sister lives fairly far away.) They also planned for a light pub dinner after. Me and Phil both had the night off, and since we barely see eachother 1 on 1 anymore took the chance to have some beers and watch a movie in my film themed basement. We decided on CMBYN since we figured we would just talk most of the time either way. Then the fruit scene came on and caught us off guard, but the movie eventually ends and we start talking about it again. We joke around as I remember the nectarines my wife has bought, and after a bathroom break brought two down. He finds it hilarious and start mimicking the scene (clothes on and platonically) but it escalates to us wondering if it really works and then deciding to test it out (mind you many beers in). After struggling to remove the pits we are fully going at it (underwear not off just at our ankles, laughing and (platonically) both demolishing the fruits, ocasionally grabbing eachothers fruits as a joke. And thats when Kate walks in, home early and with literal steam from her ears as she starts screaming at me that Im a perverted liar and to "think of our sons life who I just destroyed". I tried to tell her we were reenacting a movie scene and are just comfortable with eachother, but she would not have it (though Im pretty sure she knows about the movie). She stormed off and is probably at her moms house as Im typing this, but Im not sure since maybe she had a fight with her or the sister and thats why she came home early and emotionally overreacted a bit.
I am now taking care of our son (2years) alone while she wont pick up a single call or answer to any of my texts and I feel disrespected and misunderstood. Please I want real helpful answers since I really dont know what more to say to her, I need her to understand that we didnt do anything wrong. And leaving me with our son for multiple hours is just unfair. Am I really the asshole? I am not homophobic nor gay btw so dont call me names in the comments.
Uh… I’m afraid for those of us who hate rom coms, you’re going to have to explain this ‘fruit scene’ you reenacted.
Ok guys, I did the legwork. Here is the fruit scene:
The iconic “fruit scene” in Call Me By Your Name features Elio (Timothée Chalamet) pleasuring himself with a peach, a pivotal, sensual moment symbolizing his exploration of desire, confusion about his sexuality, and the intense feelings for Oliver (Armie Hammer), culminating in Oliver’s later interaction with the same peach as a way to absorb Elio’s essence, marking a bittersweet acknowledgment of their impending separation and connection.
OP – this is pretty gay and hypersexual to do with your friend as “a joke”. I’m not sure how you can feel misunderstood whilst misunderstanding your wife walking in on this.
YTA for showing and being shown genitalia while making love to some fruit.
The only “fruits” you should be touching is your partners. I’m going to have to go with YTA.
On the off chance this isn’t bullshit, yes, YTA. Unless you and your wife have an understanding, sex play with someone else is cheating.
Also, if it’s not bullshit, you and Phil should both spend some quiet time thinking about your sexuality. Because you’re not exactly Kinsey 0s.
“Underwear not fully off but just at the ankles…” “Leaving me alone with our son for a few hours is just unfair…”
You either must be one of the stupidest motherfuckers to walk this earth or this has to be some sort of rage bate. Never seen this movie but “just at the ankles” is an wild thing for your spouse to walk into. Good Lord. And the icing? To be mad that you have to do your duty as a father? Fucking mental mate.
Grabbing eachothers fruits too, aka literally engaging in sex acts with someone else
This genuinely can’t be real…. Please say sike…
YTA, assuming this is true.
Imagine if your platonic BFF was a girl. Would you still think it was harmless and not cheating?
You and your totally platonic friend are watching each other masturbate with fruit and also touching each other after watching a gay steamy romance movie. But dont worry honey it was just a goof! Just two guys fucking some fruit together and touching each other for goofs. We said no homo before we did it so its totally not gay.
YTA – it took me few reads and actually watching the scene of the movie to understand what happenned. So if i summarized. You were in the basement with your friend fully naked masturbating with a fruit and messing with each other fruit when your wife entered. She freaked out and left and now you are annoyed to be home with the kid while she won’t answer your call ?
I think you are the asshole, not for being that confortable with your friend, but for the fact that you are annoyed that your wife do not react “rationnaly” while she was obviously not aware you two where confortable at this level of intimacy.
Also tha fact she jumps on this conclusions directly let me suspect she asked you to clarify these in the past or had concerns about you or your friend and that she was brushed of without much clarification nor reinsurance.
“AITA for jerking my friend off with a fruit?”
YTA. It’s okay to be bisexual, but it’s not okay to explore it with your friend unless you and your wife have an agreement about it.
Let me give you your wife’s POV as she walked into the “theater”: She walks in on her husband and his best friend engaged in mutual masturbation with fruit. Now, I’m not sure where you live, but in my area, nectarines are $6.49 per pound because they are out of season. So, she walks in to you engaged in a sexual act with your buddy and you’re here asking us if you’re the asshole?
YTA. The “a few beers in” excuse doesn’t fly, as alcohol lowers your inhibitions. Personally, it would require the Jim Beam plant to re-open to make enough booze for me to even consider looking at anyone but my husband. I’m pretty sure that the idea you are a produce pounder never even entered her head before that instant. Seriously, that would freak me out, and I’m a 63 year old woman that has managed a brothel and an adult book store, as well as working in props and set dressing for the infamous Mitchell Brothers. Give your wife space to process her feelings, don’t be surprised if she chooses to only come back for her son.