I live with a roommate who came home late and said they had forgotten their wallet at work. They asked if they could just grab some of my food “this one time.”
I said no. I don’t like lending food it’s not just money, it’s that I plan my meals and buy specific things for myself. They got really annoyed and said I was being “petty” and “not a friend.”
They ended up ordering takeout but kept sulking for the rest of the night. The next day, they told our other roommate I was being selfish, and now everyone’s giving me side eyes.
I don’t feel like I did anything wrong. I’m happy to help in emergencies, but forgetting your wallet isn’t really an emergency.
AITA?
EDIT: There are some things I forgot yall. First I always ask them if the need any groceries in the house when I go shopping I just ask to be paid back for it and they decline every time. Second I told him we have bread for toast or a sandwich and he decided to order takeout. I am getting absolutely chewed up in the comments😂 but that’s ok I love hearing everyone’s opinions and reactions and seeing more outcomes I could have or should have done and will consider doing in the future.
If they can order takeout, why not just pay you back.
Sounds like they wanted free food…
NTA for standing up for yourself and your pre prepped food
We don’t know if they offered to pay him back for food or not. OP just said no. Which he is entitled to do, it is his stuff.
Info: Is this a friend, or just a room mate?
Because nothing in your post speaks of a pattern; this was a one off instance. And like, yeah, a friend would help a friend out.
They ordered take out but didn’t have any money?
If their phone has a card stored etc (Apple Pay or whatever) then they can also go buy groceries…
Nta
What person in this day and age can’t eat at their house just because they forgot their wallet? Does roommate not keep any food at home? And why not use the phone as a payment method for in person, pickup, or delivery groceries?
YTA. If your roommate had a history of leeching food off you, I would agree with you. But, it seems that wasn’t the case. Doing a nice thing once should have not been such a big deal for you.
YTA. And I’m a little surprised at the NTA and just how mean/selfish we are all becoming. I get it. It’s OP’s money/groceries. But helping someone in need is how you make friends. It’s also just a one time thing. If this was a pattern and they were constantly asking for your food, then of course you stand your ground and say no. Keep in mind that the next time you are ever in need of a favor, this roommate is not going to help you out lol.
“We don’t owe anyone anything” is reddit’s saddest common take
They weren’t in need. They made up a reason to get free food.
I’m going to disagree with you here.
OP didn’t just say they had random groceries and said no. They actually meal plan and buy groceries accordingly. There isn’t “spare food” in the fridge, it was all accounted for. Giving the room mate that food would cause a disruption in the OPs plan for st least a few days if not the week. And just “paying OP back” is insufficient recompense for the inconvenience.
And what the hell does “forgetting my wallet at work” have to do with eating a room mate’s food? They were still able to order takeout (presumably via an app). If they hadn’t forgotten their wallet what would they have done instead? Gone grocery shopping? There is probably an app for that too.
Didn’t have his wallet but was able to pay for take out? Fishy.
Looking at comments it seems you are already comfortable with your choice. You keep repeating “he just wanted my food so he didn’t have to pay.” if you are so sure, why are you here?
“I don’t like lending food”
This is an interesting concern of yours. While it’s technically not your responsibility to feed others, something happened with your upbringing that a simple ask of sharing a meal with someone who doesn’t have any makes you size up that person so aggressively. That you actually denied a person your food, and also came to complain to Reddit about it, says kind of a lot man.
Obviously your roommate ordered takeout, so they had money to eat, thankfully. But what if they weren’t able to eat that night? You saw they ordered food, so you know they did. But up until that moment you were totally fine with your friend just not eating, you actually openly said no. You are definitely asshole pocket checking food.
My god, this thread so beautifully represents how redditors are just such antisocial losers. My god people.
I mean there are circumstances where you wouldn’t be an AH. If this was regular occurance or if he was rude to you or whatever. From what I can tell though, the person you live with and are “friends?” with asked for some food and you just said no, because you’re essentially selfish.
Like yeah he can order food, but it’s slower and more expensive. And you don’t even feel bad.
So yeah, YTA and a terrible friend and don’t expect any favors moving forward. Just an fyi, this is what society is, helping each other out. You can stay as you are, a loser on the edges or maybe consider your actions from another pov