WIBTW: I (F 30) and husband ( M 32) let my older sibling and their family ( significant other and 2 kids) move in to my house because they would go homeless. I couldn’t let the kids be in the streets because I’m too nice apparently. Neither of them have jobs so they don’t pay anything except some food in the house (food stamps). When they moved in my sibling was supposed to get a job and didn’t. The significant other said they would but has not even attempt to get a job. One of their children is very disrespectful, curses at you and is a very picky eater as well as not in school due to the parents not wanting to put the kid in school. The other child is not even 2 yet. The significant other has very opinionated views that are very different from mine and my husband. The significant other will always try to prove that they are right and you are wrong. Since being here my husband and I just stay in our bedroom (we own the house and pay every single bill). Their dog keeps starting fights with ours (never had a single fight up until them moving in. We also feed their dog and buy all the dog food. My husband and I are the only source of income but are struggling to keep up since them being here due to all of my bis tripling since them being here. They did sign a lease that states I can evict them with a 30- day notice at any point in time. Would I be the A-hole if I give them a 30 day notice to vacate my house?
Edit: in the rental agreement it states rent is a certain amount and if they can not make that they will do work around the house which they have not been doing.
NTA unless you let them stay.
You absolutely would NOT be TA to give them 30 days notice to move out. However, based on what you have described, it is very possible that they will not actually leave when the 30 days are up and you will have to go the court route to evict them.
NTA. Connect them to social services, if you feel nice give them a two week notice
NTA They moved in with the promise of them getting jobs. Why would they get a job if they can mooch off you? They will never move out unless you evict them. They need to lose their kids if they’re not sending the oldest to school. Take custody of the kids if you’re worried about them. Kick parents out-they have a problem that you can not fix.
You’d be an AH to yourself and your family if you didn’t!
Am confused: if they are not paying any of the bills, what is the purpose of the lease? Was a condition on the lease that one of them gets a job?
Absolutely NTA – you gave them breathing room but it doesn’t sound like they are doing anything to get on their feet. If their kid is going to backtalk and their dog is going to start fights with yours then they are not welcome in your home. Get them in touch with social services and *change your locks* after they are out.
Any relatives with differing opinions are welcome to provide their next place to live or shut their pieholes.
If the idea for them was to get back on their feet, it just sounds like they’ve put their feet up in your house.
If it’s been months and no action, trigger the notice. But you should let them know that it should never have gotten to this point but the fact is they have done NOTHING to help themselves and just take advantage of you.
Man, the dog was enough to trigger me let alone a disrespectful kid and In-law.
NTA. Evict them now. Oh they’ll whine, complain, call you names and tell you you’re leaving their children homeless. The response to that is it’s up to them to care more about the safety and wellbeing of their children than you do. That means as a parent you do everything in your power to put your children’s basic needs first to include working to provide for them. Let them deal with the consequences of their actions. Ain’t no way I’m giving up full use of my home because of freeloaders with a disrespectful kid.
Have them served tomorrow morning!
You’d be the AH if you don’t
YWNBTA. They need to learn to adult. And they sound like freeloaders. Get them *out*.
NTA. They are clearly taking advantage of you. 30 days is plenty of time to get themselves somewhere else to crash. Sucks that they have kids, mainly the little one, but it’s not worth the stress. You did your good deed for long enough. You are not a charity. I’m all for helping family but they clearly have no respect.
Two weeks notice. And maybe the children should stay with you, if the state would pay for kinship foster care?
NTA. Give them the 30 day notice. That you have allowed them time to find a place and work, now it is time for them to go out on their own. If the child is old enough to be in school and is not, I would also report them to child protective services.