To give some context, I work in a school pt in a office. Last year I had a coworker who up and quit and left me to run the office by myself and they could not find a replacement due to the requirements of the position. Finally we got my current coworker who they deemed acceptable ( one of two who applied) despite not having any experience or a command of the language. We made do and she is nice and helpful and learns quickly.
The problem is she has no clue when it comes to office etiquette. I came back from summer break and all my bottled water that I had left in our fridge (its the two of us) were gone. Never replaced. Same goes for paper products and other consumables. I had a heater next to my desk that I purchased, I came in one day to find it behind her desk. Has not returned it and when she turns it on its way too hot ( I can’t take the heat). Its like she thinks if its there its up for grabs.
I also decorate the office to cheer it up, I came back from holiday break to find all my decorations taken down, most of which were winter related and could have been left up. I am not a difficult person but I hate people touching my things and ruining all my hard work.
To top it all off she is always taking time off. At least a few times a month and doesn’t let me know or our counterparts in other offices so we are left trying to find coverage or I work alone for the day. My boss has not addressed this issue and I feel she doesn’t want to since it was such a big deal finding someone to take the job. AITA for complaining and hoping somebody enlightens her? My chats seem to fall on deaf ears.
NTA. But have you told her you don’t appreciate this behaviour? Maybe she thinks it’s up for grabs idk. But you could inform her that it’s yours and that (assuming you have some authority over her) she has to come in on time. Make a note you did so (if you are) to your boss, so they have it on records .
INFO: have you communicated to her that the items (bottles of water, consumable paper products) were purchased by you and not by the school so they are not communal supplies?
I mean I think a few things can be addressed easily. But you aren’t an asshole.
The issue of her drinking your waters or taking your heater. I would try to first have a conversation with her and let her know, these things arent amenities provided by the school, they are your personal items that you bought for yourself.
The issue of her talking time off and not telling your and leaving you short handed. As it seems you seen the supervisor, she doesn’t really need to let you know when or why she is taking off. And if that leaves you short handed, that is on the supervisor for not getting coverage for her time off, it is not her responsibility to find coverage or tell everyone she will be off.
Talk to her in a kind and gentle way. Her time off is between her and her supervisor, not up to you, and the rest can be handled with a delicate conversation. Label what is yours in the fridge, ask for your heater back, and communicate with her. YTA for taking it to management if you did not address it with her first. These are too petty to involve the boss. You say she has no clue, so clue her in.
i mostly agree with you. I’m going to play devil’s advocate a little, particularly on the office decorations. You’re in a shared space and you‘ve put things around the whole room. Was there a discussion beforehand and shared understanding and agreement about what would be put up? Were your drink bottles labelled with your name? Paper products and consumeables should be supplied by the employer so a discussion would solve that. And as to days off, have a word with your boss about how much it destabilises your workplace and make sure they don’t take your ability to cover for granted. She is presumably entitled to the days she is taking, so it is your employer’s responsibility to make sure that work can be done without putting you under unnecessary strain.
I think this is a NAH situation. You said your chats have fallen on deaf ears which I assume means that you’ve tried to explain that those are personal belongings and not general office items for everyone to use. So you would not be the TA for bringing it to a higher up when things don’t change.
That being said, you did mention that she doesn’t have a full grasp of the language; it’s possible she thought the water bottles, paper and other items were general office supplies for everyone, the decorations were put up by you so she felt it was only fair for her to take them down, and the heater was supplied by the school etc.
She can’t know what she doesn’t know and it may not be a matter of falling on deaf ears so much as she just truly doesn’t understand what you’re saying to her. Maybe it’s time for a translator to be involved, even if it’s just Google Translate for the time being.
Just speak up. Wow. Yta until then
INFO have you idk talked to her? Told her like “hey these are my things please don’t touch them” or “why did you take the decorations down?”
YTA for not going to her directly. If I were causing a problem for a colleague, I’d want to know. At this point, you’re expecting things to magically change just because you brought it up to your boss. Your boss likely hasn’t addressed it in hopes that you will speak to your colleague about it yourself, like you should’ve done all along. I’ve had colleagues like you who sit there and stew about something someone was doing, and when they brought it up to me, I always said to talk to the person. Nine times out of ten it was resolved within the day.
Need Info: have you communicated with her directly about this? Or are you just letting it build up and not communicating? Because depending on which it is it’s between ESH and NTA.
NTA as far as her taking your stuff, but why aren’t you being direct with her about it? Her taking time off though is none of your business, between her and the boss. If you need to be informed that she’ll be out the boss should be doing that.
NTA
Tell her.
To replace your food/drinks.
To return your heater to its spot.
To leave all your property alone.
Explain her work issues to your boss, too. In writing. Point out that all her shortcomings and surprise absences fall on you.
Look for another job.
YTA. Who died and make you the decorations lord? Not everyone likes decorations. If you have your own space, you can decorate that to your heart’s content. Why are you the only person who gets a say in office decorations? Why do you not take other people’s likes/dislikes into consideration I’m regards to that? Could you have possibly gone overboard, like another poster who decorated all the way to the cabinet handles?