I’m 19 female and living in Australia.
I live 1 and a half hours away (one way) from my university campus so I make the journey there every day that I have class (3 hours round trip)
I’ve been doing this for the past 2 years and it’s been fine as I usually catch up on assignments or lectures on the train, and I don’t have to go in EVERY day, just 3 days a week usually, but I recently got a job in the city centre. This job is amazing, relevant to my study and offers night shifts, which have much better pay than day shifts, AND allow me to continue my study during the day.
I don’t want to live on campus or in a share house so I will find a 2 bedroom townhouse or apartment in/near the city to live in by myself. My parents are also ok with this.
The only issue is that a lot of men I’ve encountered think it’s a red flag for a woman (especially my age) to live alone as they think she will be partying and bringing men home to sleep with every day.
I genuinely am not a party girl, I don’t even have more than 4 friends, and am saving myself for marriage, but I’m scared any man I encounter who I want to start a romantic relationship with or marry will immediately put me in a fun only category because I no longer live with my parents and am “too independent” or perceived as promiscuous.
The only downside to staying home is that I will be spending more than 4 hours a day traveling to and from uni and to and from work, which is just not feasible for me in the long run.
Please help. Should I move out regardless, and say that I live with my parents if a guy asks me even if I live alone?
Or should I just stay at home and try to figure out my schedule, maybe working on the days I don’t have uni so I don’t spend too much time traveling?
It’s 2026. This has to be a troll.
1000%
No it’s not a troll, this is a genuine question. The men I have encountered in my life would very much be iffy if a woman lived alone
We judge those things not from your accomodations, but from your external looks and behaviour.
If you constantly talk nothing but beauty products and consumption, then we use stereotypes about dumb bimbos
You’re over analyzing this. Just do it. You’ll be fine. Who’s going to be asking if you live alone? And if someone did, you’re not obliged to answer.
In my country most kids leave home to study in a different city, sometimes really far away, at 18 and thus for me it is more weird for people telling me that they live with their parents at your age.
I’m Australian and did the same thing (commuted over an hour to uni each way) with a group of guys and girls. For a bit a few of us got a share house. Some of the girls partied hard hooking up weekly and others were mostly homebodies. There were no issues with people’s choices when we all hung out together.
It is hard to be happy if you spend your life worrying about false impressions people might ignorantly have about your lifestyle.
In any case, I find it extremely difficult to believe that anyone from a Western culture such as Australia could draw the conclusions you have mentioned from the mere fact of you living alone.
Fortunately, in such a society, you are completely free to pursue the lifestyle you wish. You can live alone and be promiscuous or live alone and not be. And no-one will care. You don’t live in a shame culture. Your fears are all in your head.
Move out. It’s not only the living situation that may give that impression. It is a combination of behaviors. And if that’s genuinely not the life you live, then it’ll obviously be reflected in your behavior, accomodations, fashion, and general lifestyle choices. You don’t want to date the men who can’t discern the difference anyways
Mate, those blokes who worry about that aren’t worth your time.
The trolls are COMPLETELY out of control on this sub…
I’m not a troll. Check my post history