I left my ex because she was extremely unstable emotionally, she would get upset from basically anything and then lash out at me.
Among the last things I heard after my mum visited us was that I was a spoiled child, that I didn’t care about the relationship, and that I had to be to her how my mum was to us. All of this after 10 really good days with her.
Days after she got mad at me from what I cooked for dinner, after telling me she didn’t mind what I made since she wasn’t hungry, and telling me that I had a fragile ego because I told her that a comment she made about me was not nice.
Anyway since about these kind of things people never openly talk, I wanted to ask online about where you draw the line. How much disrespect can you forgive? For me personally to use insults against my partner I would need to be extremely angry and that almost Jo never happens.
\> How much are you willing to forgive / put up with in a relationship?
very little
Sounds exhausting
It was dude…. Three months after break up I still get flashbacks.
Well now you know what you will not accept and look for in the next one. A learning experience
Don’t allow someone to disrespect you. Period. Setting a boundary like don’t be disrespectful and no insults is a very reasonable boundary to have. It should be common sense but still communicate that early on. If they violate that boundary break up and move on. I’ve never once insulted my fiancé or purposefully disrespected him.
For me it’s basically a given, but apparently not for everyone. From her I heard that you can fight with people that you love because if they love you back they will forgive you.
Yea that’s what an abuser says. “If you love me you’ll forgive me while I knowingly hurt you.” Hard pass. If you loved me you would try your hardest not to hurt me. You should have disagreements with your loved one from time to time. But fights? Nah. Reasonable adults and discuss their issues without a fight. My fiancé and I have been together for 3 years. We’ve had some heated discussion. Never once have we insulted each other, disrespected each other or even raised our voices. We heard each other out and worked towards a mutual solution. If we accidental hurt the other one we apologized immediately as it wasn’t our intention. Relationships shouldn’t be hard work. They should make you feel safe and understood. Set the bar higher.
This is not good for you at allll!!! Its mentally exhausting, emotionally draining, hurtful and downright disrespectful. You do not deserve to be treated like that!
Ughhh I hate rhe language that shes using with you because its going to have you questioning and doubting yourself. You absolutely without a doubt deserve someone who will treat you with love and respectful. Disagreements and discussions do not have to result in belittling and degrading you.
I don’t tolerate disrespect like that at all. Period the end.
I wouldn’t be putting up with any of this.
I’ve been divorced for a couple years now, and one thing that’s changed for me is that I won’t tolerate any abuse or anything that disrupts my peace.
Someone is being mean or disrespectful to me? Delete, block, ignore. Zero tolerance. I’m ruthless.
Monopolizing my time because she has no life of her own, leaving me hundreds of texts messages and calls in the 9 hours I’m asleep? Ghost. No notes. Bye.
Not even sex is worth it anymore. I’m used to being treated as a disposable item in relationships, but I don’t have to accept it anymore. And I won’t.
Tbh one or two small mistakes im checked out
You shouldn’t have to put up with constant bullshit and disrespect…. Can you imagine spending the rest of your life with this person that constantly makes you feel like this and lacks the self awareness to correct their own shitty actions?
Don’t let your partner disrespect you You don’t have to break up the first time, but you have to be VERY firm and clear that it cannot happen a second time. And you have to keep that, or the 3rd, 4th, etc. will keep getting worse.
And of course you should not disrespect your partner, but it sounds like you are already in agreement on that.
Date women, not girls (she’s acting like a child), problem solved.