my friend and I decided to go on a cruise (non refundable), I had originally booked in December and had came up with a payment plan (half due in January, half due in February). i asked her when originally booking if she could send the amount she could even if it was like 20 dollars at the time of booking (🚩). she said she would and did not do that. i was originally really freaking out due to this but had accepted that i might have to end up eating some of the cost if she did not pay me but would be similar to the amount that id pay if i went solo. I was more ok with fronting the cost prior to me having surgery.
for context, she was in a tough spot financially not too long before agreeing to go but had got a job n seeming to be in a better spot (🚩). ive seen her spend money on silly things after asking for help financially from people prior to(🚩). there was an issue with booking (maybe a sign from God lol) and now we would have to rebook again. prices are higher now but travel agency figured something out for us where we’d essentially be paying the same cost as originally booked. I had called her prior to them figuring this out and this is now a month after originally booking and she was complaining about how she set money aside for rent but she "forgot" about her 200 dollar a month personal trainer and money for stuff etc (🚩). I asked her if she was sure she could afford going and was still able to pay for agreed upon dates (half due this day/half due at other date). she said yes no problem. now, she asks me if she could let me know in a few days that she is able to pay half by the 20th because her rent is due the 25th (🚩). we also have to book flights (i refuse to front her for this). I also told her when the trip was originally planned that she needs to get a passport (or can use her ID/birth certificate) and she just recently said that she didnt think she needed a passport and now has to go budget for that as well…. but also if you want to get a passport then you need to do this like right now.
however, in my eyes you have already essentially had a month to come up with half of the deposit and should have budgeted accordingly and you are seeming not very responsible.
for that reason I am not comfortable with booking now until she gives me the half of the money on the 20th (with the risk of prices going up again) and if she says she can not pay that half on the 20th I am going to tell her that she can catch the next trip. she also did not want to get trip insurance but i told her she had to ($40) especially since i am the one fronting the money and it at least gives me the chance to possibly get my money back. this is non-refundable & in the event that she cancels for nonmedical reasons that she will not be getting her half of the half of the money back (will reiterate). this at least keeps me at the price I would have paid going solo.
AITA to tell her that I am no longer comfortable fronting her on the trip.
NTA. Do not front her any money for any reason; she sound extremely unreliable, and I’d honestly have serious reservations about going on vacation with her at all.
NTA. The error gives you a good way out. Just let her know that you can’t manage to organise this for both of you without her pitching in, particularly after the booking error. Then save yourself from her panic when she discovers about her passport.
She’s already shown that she isn’t going to front up the cash, why would you want to continue to pursue this? If you want to go on the cruise, go alone. Lean into being uncomfortable and make new friends there.
NTA if you do/do not go without her
Just book for yourself and pay the solo surcharge. If she wants to come, she can do the same. And you both get your own cabins. When she inevitably doesn’t come, it will be way less annoying for you to be paying extra just for yourself and your friendship might survive. But yeah… she’s not paying you back for this
NTA. Too many red flags for you to ignore the possibility her share of the trip would be paid. She will probably expect you to pay food, misc expenses while on vacay. I suggest you book your trip, give her all the details to do her share and she can pay and go…or not. I do understand that the cost of the actual travel is a bargain, but she honestly doesn’t sound like she’s that eager to go. Since she just got a new job, would she even get the time off to travel?
NTA. If your friend has to wait to see if she can pay her rent before paying you for her cruise ticket, she shouldn’t be going on one. The price of the ticket is the cheapest part. There is also airfare, excursions, gratuities, food and drink off the ship, alcohol, internet, taxis, souvenirs, service fees, casino spending, etc. I would call it off immediately and either find another friend to go with, go alone, or wait until she is more financially stable and go then. If you keep these plans it will be a disaster.
You are foolish ass to front for such a “friend”.