CONTEXT: This was not the tipping point that caused the breakup, this happened some time ago but now that we are broken up I feel comfortable posting this story and I’m looking for validation to know that I’m not insane.
My now ex (22f) threw an acai bowl on the floor because I (23m) had to pee and pulled over at a gas station.
Yes you read that right and for context read my other posts of this same person. My now ex and I broke up and I needed a place to vent about some of the things she did that make me feel insane.
Anyways, we were nearing the end of a 2 hour drive and the plan from the start was to stop at this açaí bowl place that is drive thru only and has no indoor for customers and no bathrooms. My gf at the time had fallen asleep about 30 minutes into the drive but I knew what the plan was so as I was getting off the freeway I stopped at the gas station to pee due to me finishing an energy drink during that time. She woke up as I was getting out the car and I said I’d be right back. I got back in the car and drove to the acai bowl place and she told her order to the speaker, I then paid and handed her the bowl.
(to preface I didn’t get anything as I don’t tend to eat breakfast so this was purely for her)
We finished the last 10 minutes of the drive and got out the car to go inside until she closed the door on me and I realized “oh she’s mad about something”. We went upstairs to her room where she then started yelling at me because I woke her up to go pee. I tried explaining that I really had to pee and I knew that we were going to the acai bowl place and that I couldn’t wait till once we got back to her place. I also noted that she would’ve had to wake up a couple minutes later anyways because I didn’t know what she wanted to eat. She didn’t care for my explanation and told me that I’m selfish and that I didn’t actually have to pee and should’ve waited, she even wanted me to admit it. I told her I promise her that I couldn’t hold it in anymore and as I was saying that she threw her OPEN acai bowl on the carpeted floor. I stood there in shock for a good minute till I ended up just going down to the kitchen because of how dumbfounded I was to see her act like that.
An hour or so later she texted me to talk back in her room and I agreed. Upon arriving to her room she asked me to clean the floor. I told her that she caused the mess and that I’ll help her but she’s gotta help. She refused and I stupidly cleaned it up on my own. I wish I could tell you I broke up with her then or that I stood up for myself but I didn’t. I instead apologized for peeing, stated that she’s right and that I shouldn’t have stopped, and told her that it wouldn’t happen again.
This scenario also replays in my head as I don’t get what the issue was with needing to pee. I get she was sleeping but she would’ve had to wake up within the next 5 minutes regardless. We’re broken up now and I’m looking for clarity
AITA?
NTA. This isn’t about peeing it’s about control. Waking up someone to use the bathroom is normal. Throwing food yelling and making you clean it up is not.
Nta. I would have peed ON THE MESS SHE MADE, then left her to deal with it. That’s unacceptable behavior from her. What an ungrateful woman. I’m also female so I can be angry for you! You couldn’t hold it, and it’s not like you were going to ruin your car. 😡 she needs a reality check. You are 100% nta.
Peeing on the mess like a dog 😭 come on don’t put yourself down to that level.
Hes not wrong in this situation though NTA.
Lmaooooo I should’ve
Thank goodness you broke up. She is unhinged. NTA.
NTA, your only regret should be not breaking up with her when she threw the food. You two weren’t refugees on a month long trek where she suffered immensely, it was a two hour trip.
I regret dating her
NTA, when you gotta go, you gotta go
NTA – sounds like she has some issues she needs to work on and she’s taking it out on you. Wishing you the best on healing and hoping your ex can learn how to get help for their issues.
NTA run. If you stay with her you will have a thousand more of increasingly insane stories
I am sorry wtf ? Definitely NTA, now tell me what she did that made you breakup cause I can’t imagine a worse behaviour then this
NTA.
This is abuse. The fact that you’re questioning exiting this shows how you’ve been impacted by this abuse.
It is not normal for someone to throw a tantrum because a driver or passenger has to stop to use the bathroom. It is not normal to throw food like a child. It is not normal to subjugate your partner and demand they clean up the mess you made during your tantrum. This was about control, making you small, and making her feel big. It’s very ‘look at what you made me do.’
You’ll probably consider asking her for forgiveness. Or she’ll manipulate you into giving it another shot. Don’t. It doesn’t improve.
How long were you with this psycho?
You’ll never be able to understand because your gf wasn’t being logical. She was gaslighting you int being the bad guy. So glad you left her.