I (31m) am going back to college after dropping out about 9 years ago. I am currently taking a course that involves developing a project with a group over the entire semester. I am in a group with 4 other students, I will use fake names for them.
Our first project presentation was today and it was terrible, I feel I did 90% of the project myself and hardly anyone else participated. I do not anticipate getting a decent grade for the presentation. Only one other student, Tony (20’s M) helped in any meaningful way, I would still consider it doing the bare minimum. 2 other students, Andy (20s M) & John (30s M) did even less than that. One group member, Jack (20s), who actually did contribute around the same amount as Tony, let us know that they were dropping the class the morning of the presentation and did not show up.
With the amount of time it took me to rush the project over the weekend, it cost me studying for a test in a different class that I also don’t think I did very well on. I was already worried trying to balance multiple classes and my full time job, but this group project is pushing me over the edge. I was planning on emailing my professor to let her know the reasons why I was dropping the class, but I’m wondering if I should just drop it and move on without saying anything. When I spoke to my wife (33f), who said I should have brought this up to my professor earlier and emailing my professor my thoughts on the group after the fact would just be causing drama.
WIBTA if I told my professor the reason I am dropping her class is because of my project groupmates?
your wife is right about how you should’ve brought this up way earlier, but I would say YWNBTA because the other students should be held accountable and encouraged for the future to actually participate in group projects.
your wife is right, you should have spoke up right away. because now your dropping out and they are still there wasting everyones time. use some common sense this is your future and your money and your time you handed to these people. no verdict on this one
NTA, you don’t owe the prof an explanation but I agree with your wife. I don’t know your prof’s personality, but I am an instructor and I would want this information (however, I have learned to tightly control any group projects)
If you want advice on how to approach the conversation, I would be glad to help.
I think dropping the class and giving up shouldn’t be your first choice and you would be an AH if you don’t try to problem solve first.
Talk to the professor and see if there are options to change groups or do an alternative project first.
NTA
But your wife is right. You are a mature, conscientious student sadly finding that your younger colleagues had less inclination or care for the class, possibly safe in the knowledge that you would do the work.
One of the project learnings may be about bringing team together and managing competing time factors, everyone’s other commitments etc. You could speak with your professor and explain your frustration BUT be able to tell her what you learned from the experience about the importance of firm commitment setting and team accountability.
You won’t be the first, nor last, student who has had this experience.
You’re an adult learner. Act like it. What exactly did you expect the professor to do AFTER THE FACT? You need to take responsibility for not holding the group members accountable. Next time, you email/call/text and save the proof. If they don’t respond, you go to the prof with the proof and ask for guidance. You are only responsible for YOUR part; if they don’t do it, do yours and let the prof ask where the others are. At this late date, you need to go explain what happened and how you would handle it differently. Most profs are very understanding but they aren’t mind readers, so if you aren’t communicating, that’s on you. Group projects are stupid but they reflect real life- what happens if your coworkers screw you over? You gonna quit or communicate with the boss? You have to work your way thru the conflict. If your prof refuses to see reason, then you file an appeal over your grade but you never do the work for everyone else, period.
This here. Everyone hates/hated group projects for this exact reason. As far as I’m concerned, the conflict resolution and dealing with people IS the lesson. Most fail.
NAH
There is no interpersonal conflict.
I will say that you dropping would be doing yourself a disservice.
You dropped out of college 9 yrs ago and you’re about to drop a class because of a group project.
In real life, you don’t often get to pick the group you have to team up with to take work to the finish line.
You can’t just quit everything when it gets hard…. well, maybe you could, but that won’t take you very far in life.
Hasn’t the withdrawal period passed? You’d only be hurting yourself here.
NAH, but you’re cutting off your nose to spite your face.
YTA. You’re an adult, act like it. The time to talk to your professor was before now. Additionally, depending on when your college lets you drop classes, dropping late can have some negative consequences on your financial aid if you receive it.
YTA for this entire situation. Group projects are famously difficult and full of people who don’t contribute. That’s school, that’s life. You should have spoken up like an adult before you pushed yourself to the edge and dropped the class. What’s the professor going to do with this information now? I’m sure half the projects went this same way, or perhaps they went better because she knew who was doing the work and who wasn’t.
This happens in each group presentation. If you do your bit, don’t drop the class. Learn how to not carry the load for future and also focus on other classes. This is a lesson for uni but also for life and work. The professor doesn’t need excuses. You make it work or don’t.
I think calling out the other people in your group at this point would seem like a way to avoid consequences after failing to take responsibility. If you were having issues with the group, you should have communicated that earlier on **with the group** and tried to mend the gap. (You could have taken the opportunity to be a leader!) If that didn’t work, then you should have reached out to your instructor before the presentation was due.
I think this is one of those situations where your only being an AH to yourself… dropping when things get hard/blaming others is **not** how we educate ourselves!
NTA. But talk to the professor about grading and the situation first. People equating this to a work situation are off base IMO. I worked FT and did an MS nights. It’s a lot to waste time on a class to get a shitty grade in TWO classes because your group is lazy. Dropping is a valid solution, but there’s no guarantee you get a better group next time. She might have given you the slackers on purpose because of your age.