I just had an argument with my friend because he called me childish because I deleted the messages I’ve sent to him earlier today when he asked "What did you have for breakfast" and ends up sending a Homer Simpson hiding meme instead.
The reason why I deleted that is because I feel disrespected that he didn’t say anything to me at all but keeps on replying to my messages halfheartedly using emojis or meme instead of replying to my messages because he’s supposedly busy for weeks (In fact, he just got back from a 2 days vacation with his friends).
Note : even when he says he’s busy, he always got the time to post stories on Insta/WhatsApp but always replied to me halfheartedly. And yes…I do want to be more than friend with him but not right now.
Him :
"How is it a personal attack?
Look, when I’m busy, I can’t always speak nicely, so then what?
Am I supposed to just wait on you?"
My Response :
"Who is asking you to always wait on me? Usually, you reply late and I don’t have a problem with it. I’m not asking you to wait for my messages and reply immediately; it’s not like we’re in a relationship or anything. 😆
But honestly, in the beginning, we respected each other even if we didn’t chat at lightning speed and had our own busy schedules.
Lately, it hasn’t felt good when I start a conversation and you just reply half-heartedly with emojis or pictures, and it keeps happening. Now that I’m replying half-heartedly and deleting messages, you called me a ‘child.’
If I didn’t love and care about you, I wouldn’t be talking this openly and nicely like this. I’m not saying this to tie you down so you aren’t free and always have to be with me. I understand, you and I both still want to explore.
But, we are both adults; when we talk, it should be with mutual respect, two-way. Don’t just do it half-heartedly.
I’m not mad at you, you know. 😆
Take it easy, let’s just talk."
Ummm…ESH
You two are my age and acting like teenagers.
OMG yes. How is everyone involved in this situation any older than 14? I had to double check I read the ages right.
He’s your friend not your boyfriend 🙂
It depends on when you deleted his messages to you. If you deleted the messages before you spoke to him about why you were unhappy with the quality of his texts, then it comes off like you’re punishing him or throwing a tantrum instead of giving him an opportunity to understand where you’re coming from and to do better. If you deleted them after you spoke to him, because he saw nothing wrong with his behavior and expressed no desire to change, then you were just getting some toxicity out of your life.
That’s the thing. He already know that I’ve been unhappy with his text and I even apologized to him the day before, for being a non-interesting person for him to talk with. He just replied by saying “It’s okay, there’s nothing wrong, it’s just that I’m too busy”. There’s no sorry whatsoever coming from him which left me wondering.
This only happens on text tho. When we met IRL before this, he’s so talkative and caring and attentive. We even texted each others that we’re interested in each others and we’re both happy to see each other. Maybe just a lip service?
Him not replying to you is a message itself. He wants some distance. Perhaps he’s not communicating that well, but you should back off and match the energy.
I’d much rather him not replying to me so that I could match his energy. But…He replied to me halfheartedly. Not responding to the conversation, but just “🤣🤣🤣” or meme pic.
But when I did the same, he called me childish which left me wondering 😐
don’t respond to his halfhearted messages next time. there’s nothing you could meaningfully add to a dead conversation anyways.
You are kinda AH against yourself. Deleting messages is childish. And if you get this upset about everything he is doing, whilst “only being friends”, you are clearly lying to yourself. Give him an ultimatum, ask if he wants to be more than friends, and if he says no move on. Being rejected is easy compared to being put on hold. That will drain you and break you and turn you into a person who is gaslit by everything (and it sounds like you are well on the way there). I was in your situation several times as I was younger. When you meet a person compatible with you you will feel safe and cared for and listened to. It is worth the wait. Drop this guy.
Well…I didn’t expect my heart to be written out in the open like this by you haha. I was thinking exactly the same thing as you but unable to act honestly.
Probably because of the memories we had when we meet or during our first encounters.
Thank you for this 😄
People aren’t what and how you project them to be, they are their own living beings.
Grow up.
YTA for using “halfhearted” 10000 times, and for being childish.