My 14 year old son and this 18 year old girl both volunteer at an animal shelter near us. They and a few other people in the same age category as them recently were in charge of hosting a charity event for the shelter. Someone made a group chat on Snapchat so they could discuss it.
The 18 year old added him on Snapchat. I go through my son’s phone to make sure he’s being safe online. Which he knows. I’m not too familiar with Snapchat so I was clicking on these things on the top. Which showed peoples stories but I thought they were messages directly to the person. They were all normal enough until I get to the 18 year olds. It was a video of her vape which had exploded. With text on the screen which said “What the f\*ck. It exploded.” And even more swearing in the actual video.
I didn’t appreciate someone sending a video of a vape and swearing to my son so I messaged the person on his account saying “who are you? Why did you send me that?” Pretending to be my son. She then unfriended my son without responding. I told my son about the situation and he explained those things are stories and for everyone and it’s the girl from the animal shelter.
I still thought it was innaproprate of her to add him when she posts such things on there. I told the animal shelter about the situation and they made it so she couldn’t do the event and she now volunteers on different days to when my son is volunteering because I said I’m uncomfortable with her influencing my son.
The girls mother has since messaged me defending her saying I am a huge asshole and that her daughters really embarrassed and she only added him incase they needed to talk about the event and apparently she has got a learning disability so sometimes doesn’t realise if things are inappropriate but in her opinion her daughter didn’t even do anything inappropriate she just posted about her vape exploding on her story and naming worse things people could’ve done.
Either way I feel like what she did was really inappropriate. Am I really in the wrong here?
Yta
Yes. You are 100% in the wrong. Protecting your son is good, but the 18 year old who posted about her vape to her friends didn’t actually do anything wrong.
Why are you parenting someone else’s child?
You are only responsible for your son. I respect you are making sure he is being safe online. But you can’t control what other people post 😂 and trust me there’s a lot worse online than a vape exploding
YTA. Do you think your 14 year-old has never heard anyone swear before? Or has never seen another teenager with a vape? Holy crap. Let him breathe.
Oh no, not *swearing!* And now your teenager knows vapes exist, which he very most definitely did not before. Oh dear, how did you ever manage not to simply pass out right then and there from the horror?
YTA so fucking much for pretending to be your son, and interfering with her volunteer work because you can’t be bothered to *actually* parent your son, which involves things like talking to him before flying off the handle about crap you don’t even understand.
YTA. Big time! Gross, do better.
I was expecting nudes or worse. But a vape, babes? And bad words? Lmao
YTA. Your kid probably hears worse than that at school, assuming he does so outside the home. Honestly he could probably hear worse than that just being out in public. This is weird.
Parent of a 15 and 18 year old. YTA Talk about an overreaction… I worry you aren’t this overbearing all the time.
YTA you’re really naive to think that your son doesn’t drop f bombs with his friends lol. You’re also a big ol’ AH for screwing up this girls opportunity to volunteer in a way she enjoys. She didn’t do anything bad to your son. You sound like an overprotective helicopter parent.
YTA- if the worst thing your son sees is the word “fuck” and a vape, you’re very lucky. this kid is 14, he’s not in kindergarten any more. you can’t protect him forever. let him grow up.
i thought his face was posted, or his body. jfc.
YTA for this heavily misleading title, it was swearing and a vape, 2 things I’d imagine they’re exposed to daily at school
Going through your sons phone for his protection is fine, acting like you’re him and confronting others without knowing how technology works makes Yta
YTA. Believe it or not, teens swear. if “fuck” is what you’re worried about him hearing, just take his phone away. The internet will not shelter him the way you want to. you also had no right to message her pretending to be your son. very weird behavior on your part.