I, 30M and ny girlfriend, 30F are waiting for the birth of our daughter. She’s at term now, and things could happen at any point.
We’re getting frustrated quite a bit by our families, that keeps on calling us all the time and text, asking about a status. As soon as they don’t hear from us every 2h.
It’s getting to the point where my GF is stressed, and we had to tell them "you will know when something happens, no need to keep asking. We will update you.
That does not seem to have worked. My sister tried to call me 6 times yesterday in the span of 20 minutes.
AITA ?
NTA but you might want to mute notifications, and maybe just check messages once a day or something, so that you’re not bombarded with enquiries – tell them that you’re doing this, because you want some peace and quiet before the big event, and to warn them that you won’t be replying particularly promptly.
>My sister tried to call me 6 times yesterday in the span of 20 minutes.
If she won’t stop, block her temporarily. Unless you need her help during the birth process, because she may be trying to plan her week. But if she’s just nosy/excited, then give yourself a break from her.
Good idea, thanks. Just don’t want to seem like a dick
NTA
Decline calls, it’s the only way people learn you don’t want to talk.
Or, if you’re petty, set a bunch of scheduled texts that say nothing interesting to be delivered in the middle of the night, give them a taste of their own medicine.
Appoint one person in your extended family as “point person.” You will call them to let them know when you are on your way to the hospital. They will alert everyone else. Then auto forward your phone to that person’s number.
Put your phones on Do Not Disturb. Tell them they are not helping and will get no further updates until something has happened. Good luck establishing boundaries with this group.
NTA. Just stop answering. I’d also be tempted to say “if you don’t stop pestering us every two minutes, we won’t even let you know when baby is here”. They’re doing it because you’re not shutting them down.
Temporarily block
State that you will be declining all phone calls and not replying to texts until you are ready.
But also DO NOT update them until the baby is already born and you are prepared to talk with them. Call one person for each side and ask them to share with the others and then put your phone back on do not disturb.
Clearly state and communicate about visitors etc too because from the sounds of it they might just turn up.
NAH.
Start a family group. Give a short update to everyone in the morning and politely let them know that YOU should get in touch if there’s anything new. You want peace and quiet, as it’s a tiring time. If there are no family emergencies, you don’t want to be called. Best of luck and good health to the baby.
NTA – seriously folks the baby will come when it’s damn ready to come. And I can guarantee that the parents will be posting birth notices as soon as they can after the birth, and if you are anything like myself and five billion other parents, you won’t shut up about the abby’s progress for the next 15 years. 😉.
Hounding the parents to be constantly is a bit of an asshole move.
NTA. Send a group chat – you’re creating stress we will let you know when & if we want you to know anything. If you call or text again, you will be blocked
NTA. The next message to send is
“Friends and family. We are putting our phones on Do Not Disturb as we are unable to keep up with all the check-ins. We’ll be in touch when we have news to share.”
NTA
Group text
We’ve had enough of the intrusions I’ve asked you once
You’re causing stress
I’m blocking everyone
I’m not going to update you when we’re in labour.
I’m not going to update you when we’re at the hospital. I’ll inform the staff there is to be no info or visitors
I’m not going to tell you about the birth until we’re ready to tell everyone
We’re now not allowing any visitors at the hospital after the birth
I will not be informing anybody when we’re going home
We won’t be having any visits at all for several weeks and won’t be giving updates
You all caused this
Then you block OP