My daughter was suppose to get married in about 4 months. I learned earlier this week that the wedding is off and it has been off for about a month now and I just learned about it.
In short, he learned that my daughter cheating on him early into the relationship and called it off.
I personally have given her money for the wedding under some conditions. it was not a gift. The main condition was to have a venue that was accessible for people with disabilities.
So I put down the money for the venue.
Anyways the wedding is canceled and the venue doesn’t go refunds. She has already told them she will not need the time slot and nothing will happen that day.
I still need to pay the venue, they are not giving me any money back and are holding the price.
I called her and told her that I need help pay for the venue. That since the wedding don’t happen I need her to pay me back some.
We had a huge argument and she called me cruel for doing this. I pointed out the wedding would have happened if she didn’t cheat on the man and that this wasn’t a gift at all.
She pissed and I am out like 10k…
I would consult some laws in your state and the contract that you signed. Most venues do not require payment in full after cancellation but will not refund deposits. It is unlikely that you should have to finish paying the venue.
Regardless of that, NTA. She cheated and caused the demise of the relationship, costing you a significant sum of money.
Yeah, it’s weird he put down a deposit but has to still pay the full amount even though it’s cancelled. Isn’t that the entire point of a deposit?
I’m a women ( weird everyone is assuming I am a man)
The way this venue works is that it has to be paid in full by the wedding date.
It is in the contract. Most people just take out a loan and pay it at once.
Multiple venues we looked at had this policy and didn’t do payment plans after the wedding date
It almost is paid in full
Everyone defaults male even if you say otherwise…it’s annoying. (You’re NTA btw)
Use “they” if you don’t know, people! It’s not hard
I can see default male here only because the dumb sexist ‘father of bride pays’
When it has to be paid and how much you get back if you cancel are two different things. Most venues will specifically have a cancellation section in the contract that outlines how much they keep if you cancel based on how far in advance of the wedding date it is. Just because you’ve given them the money doesn’t mean you aren’t entitled to some of it back.
Well, if you’re being forced to pay anyway don’t let the venue just straight up steal your money. Throw some other kind of party since they have your cash anyway
They shouldn’t make you pay full price for something that you’re not using.I would definitely look into that.I understand losing a deposit , but not the entire price of the thing that doesn’t make sense , I would speak to them directly if you’re going through her
There are some venues who will make you pay AND try to find another paying customer for that time. There was an AITA pretty recently about a guy who decided to have a video game party in his venue when a similar situation happened and they wouldn’t refund him, and they had the gall to get angry that they couldn’t earn double by reselling the space to someone else as well and they “only” got that OP’s payment. He was like either refund me, or I’m going to use it however I see fit. So it’s not right, but it’s also apparently not uncommon.
NTA, but you could just hold a big family reunion or something at the venue. Don’t lose that money since you’ll be paying for it regardless of whether you use it.
If the venue _insists_ on paying the full amount, you bet I’m going to be there.
Even if it’s just me and my giant bag of confetti.
That venue doesn’t make any sense? That’s why there’s a deposit. You won’t get that back, of course, but you shouldn’t have to pay for the full venue.
Edit: She still has four months before the event. Most venues only require final payment 30–90 days beforehand. At that point she’d likely lose the deposit, but owing the full venue cost would depend on the cancellation terms in the contract.
You know that and I know that, but not the people in AI stories.
Wait wait wait what do u mean you STILL need to pay the venue? The hell you do! That’s what the deposit is for. Do not give them another dime.
Also NTA, she quite literally fucked around and now shes finding out.