I used to be friends with this guy. He wanted more than friendship, but I didn’t. I was clear about that.
Later, I met someone else and I’m now in a relationship. He knows about my boyfriend.
For **more than six months**, he has been trying to buy me gifts. I always said no and told him he doesn’t need to do that, and that I don’t want to accept gifts from him. He keeps bringing it up and keeps trying to stay in contact. I barely answer whenever he texts me and I have always rejected his offer.
Yesterday was my birthday. He wanted to give me a gift, but it was very expensive, way too much in my opinion. I told him again that he doesn’t have to and that I don’t want it, but he really pushed.
Now I’m wondering:
AITA if I accept this expensive gift? He wanted to pay for an 180 Dollar dinner and kept asking what else I wanted to have so that he can buy it for me. He already told me about more stuff he wants to gift me for no reason.
And AITA if I keep accepting gifts from him in the future, even though he still wants more from me?
He knows I have a boyfriend, and I’ve clearly said he doesn’t have to do this and that I don’t want to accept it.
PS: I’ve told my boyfriend about this so he’s kinda fine with it becase he trusts me. The dinner happened already with another friend of mine and he wanted to pay for it afterwards.
not only will you be an asshole but you’re also leading him on.
And a dinner isn’t exactly a gift, it’s an outright date, pretty much cheating at that point if you “accepted” it
INFO: You say you “used to be friends”. What are you now?
Dinner’s not a gift, it’s a date.
ESH
Why are you maintaining a friendship with this person? No good can come of it.
If you accept the gift he considers it a payment for something. That’s twisted and wrong, but judging from your history so far do you feel this person understands boundaries?
Yes, the dollar amount doesn’t matter. This person’s obviously not right in the head, but you would be engaging in whatever fantasy they have in their head.
Yes YWBTA
If you have a boyfriend and accept gifts from this other fella, it’s going to cause friction between you and your boyfriend.
It sounds like you don’t want this friend in your life, if you don’t, time to start cutting contact and blocking him. You really don’t need this in your life, constantly saying no to someone.
Men like this are dangerous because they won’t accept a no.
You don’t know what else he won’t accept a no for yet.
Please do not be in contact with this man, let alone giving him access to your food and drinks. You could be roofied
YTA
YWBTA. You need to stop seeing this guy. He wants more, you don’t and are in a relationship.
girl 💀 YTA for not blocking this man already
You absolutely would be the asshole. You’re setting yourself for harassment because it would encourage him to keep trying, and at the same time you’d be taking money from someone simply because you can, which is immoral.
He’s trying to buy your affection and guilt you into dating. If you feel bad about accepting expensive gifts from someone you aren’t interested in- you should. Don’t accept his gifts.
Do not accept gifts… this might make them think they have an “in” or that you “owe” them. Just don’t. It’ll create more problems than what any gift is worth.
Edit: also if this guy keeps being persistent and not taking no for an answer… that’s not a friend, they doesn’t respect your clearly set boundaries and you should stop interacting with them.
YUP!
YTA
You’re accepting something from him that he clearly has conveyed that comes with a reciprocal something.