A week and a half back, I got into a car accident with some drunk guy and have a (mild) TBI now. So that’s great.
My wife seems to think I had like a brain aneurysm or something. For example, last Saturday, I said I was going to go to the gym. She goes "No you’re not" (like I was asking for permission) and said that lifting something something is bad if you have a concussion/tbi. Which I appreciate the concern but I don’t really like need it. I’m a grown man and I’m the one with the injury here so I know my limits.
So I’m going to my car, and my wife is saying "I don’t think you should go" and I tell her that I got it, and she can leave me alone now. Thanks.
When I got back from the gym, my wife is giving me the cold shoulder. Like I told her to go fuck herself or something. I understand that telling her to leave me alone wasn’t that nice, and I apologized but she was sore after that for a little bit.
AITA?
YTA. She’s concerned for you. Did your doctor tell you you can lift weights a few days after getting a traumatic brain injury?
oh no, your wife is concerned about your well being, HOW DARE HER!
YTA
Info: did you get medical clearance yet?
If no: Y T A
If yes: N A H, she’s just worried about you, lay off
You shouldn’t be driving at this point with a tbi, Yta
YTA. Were you this dumb before the injury?
YTA. Shit like this is why women live longer than men.
jesus fuck, god forbid a woman loves her husband and is concerned for his wellbeing
get over yourself
YTA.
Your wife cares about you. She doesn’t want you to injure yourself more. You have a freaking Brain Injury. That isn’t something to take lightly. Do you want to push yourself to a brain aneurysm??
You may be a grown man, but you are sure acting like a petulant child who was told he can’t play with his toy.
Btw- did you also know that irritability and aggression are side effects from a TBI? Which ironically, it seems you’ve shown a lot to your wife, and expressed in this post.
YTA.
You just sustained a traumatic brain injury. She’s anxious, scared, and concerned. She’s researching because she’s scared and concerned.
And instead of communicating with her and maybe working out an agreement (ie, monitoring working out or something), you shut her down and you shut her out.
No wonder she’s shut you out. She’s hurt and responding in kind to your freezing her out.
Edit: Both of you need to sit down and have a conversation.
You can know your limits until something happens, and you find out you surpassed your limits. It happens all the time, unfortunately. (I work in healthcare and have seen it many a time).
She’s scared and she’s concerned. And while it may come off as nagging and it’s annoying to you, it’s just telling you that she’s worried and she’s terrified of the unknowns and something possibly happening to you. Brain injuries are so complex, they are so unpredictable, they are TERRIFYING. She’s scared, and she’s just wanting a little reassurance and a feeling of being in control in a situation where she feels out of control.
You need to see where she’s coming from. Put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel if she had a brain injury, you’re scared and reading it’s not recommended to do something, and she goes out and does it anyway? Talk to her and explain that while you understand she’s scared, anxious, and concerned, you’re going to continue to live your life within the parameters your neurologist/MD believes are safe.
Maybe both of you sit down and come up with compromises. Working out at the gym, maybe see if she or a friend can go with you the first few times. Maybe see about wearing a monitor to ensure there are no significant concerns there. But she’ll feel more confident and less anxious if you two communicate and maybe compromise on certain things. You shouldn’t have to live a life less than. But she shouldn’t have to live a life scared of if you’re going to drop dead.
You actually sound like a person with a TBI, over reacting and hair trigger anger are hallmark signs. She’s right by the way.
YTA, it’s a mild TBI until you injure yourself in the gym or driving again and now it’s a life threatening injury. She’s right and you just snapped at her for caring about you. Grow up.
YTA. If you’ve been cleared by a doctor you should just tell her that. If you haven’t been cleared then you shouldn’t be lifting. Its super simple. All you have to do is call or email to confirm.
You got a TBI a *week and a half ago* and you’re *driving?*
YTA. Go apologize to your wife for being a reckless asshole and don’t put other people on the road in danger while you’re still recovering!
YTA because she doesn’t want you to stroke out and die and you’re like, “Gains before brains.”