im 21 ( F ) i had brought my brother 18 ( M ) a car with my bonus money from the navy for joining 2 years ago . the car cost 8k . me and my family just made it up and im asking them to pay me back what they owe me. they owe me 4.7 k but i told them just pay me back 3k .
I was told that if i bought the car they would pay me back . now my older sister 22 ( F ) saying my brother shouldn’t pay me back since he was a 16 and he was young and didn’t know any better etc and our mother should pay for it .
He crashed the car ( wasn’t his fault ) they got money from it and the check was supposed to go to my mom and my mom was going pay me back with it but my sister somehow got the check in my brother name and took the check for herself and bought another car for my brother .
My mother says she already paid almost half and she ain’t paying anymore and it’s my brother responsibility .
i found out my brother is buying a new PC which is over 1k .
i want to know who’s in the wrong , me or my sister ? we are going to reddit . she thinks people will take her side etc . my other family members are picking my side .
Edit : i already made a post about the situation in the past but this is an update . i just want honest answer so my sister can see what i am coming from .
Honestly all of your family is in the wrong
Sister shouldn’t have taken money that wasn’t hers to then buy your brother the car. Brother should have appreciated the money and the car and understood it was meant to be paid back. Your mom saying she’s not paying you back anymore when the original deal was to be paid back fully
NTA but this is a hard lesson never loan money you aren’t willing to lose. Never loan money to your family
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Yes this is the big lesson here. You now have a GREAT reason for the rest of your days, to NEVER lend money to family, at least without a promissory note of some kind or collateral. Because THIS is what happens, especially in your extremely messy and irresponsible family.
oh i learned my lesson trust .
Honestly, OP has learned this young, before her credit is ruined, and at comparatively little expense (I know $8k is real money, but for 8K you have a built in excuse to not lend any of them any money ever again). Meet any requests with a comment that you aren’t lending any more money until you get reimbursed for the last loan. You don’t even have to say out loud you wouldn’t trust them as far as you could throw them.
Family and money never mix. Lesson learned, should’ve gotten it in writing. Your sister is manipulating the situation and taking advantage that you’re not around. Cut your losses and make a better life for yourself through your Navy career and once you’re out.
Your family is TA. Your sister can claim your brother was a minor, but legal and moral are two different things. She should be an example of how to live in this world, not how to cheat. What goes around…. If she believes what she is saying, she will surround herself with people that agree. Eventually she will be the one cheated by the people that agree with her.
thank you for this text cause imma sure send this to her 🙏🏽 cause this what i literally been tryna explain to her about but she keeps insisting that she isn’t wrong and always right
NTA. If your sister is reading this, here’s a little message for her: You’ve just proven you can never be trusted. OP, never lend anyone in your family a single cent. They’ll steal it no matter if they claim it’s just a loan and you’ll be paid back. You can’t trust them, especially not your sister.
yea after that i don’t even loan them anymore . i stop caring tbh . i cut them off for almost a year but we start back talking and all i want is my money . if i don’t receive it soon then imma go back to cutting them off
Your sister took money that should have been used to pay you back. That’s what would have happened if they had taken out a loan on the car to begin with. Your sister is seriously lacking in character. NTA
she keeps thinking it’s my brother money but thing is he would have never got that check / car if it wasn’t for me. plus the check was enough money to pay me back . all this could have been over
Your sister is the ahole, not you. Your family has broken their word and can’t be trusted anymore when it comes to money.