This happened a couple days ago and now I’m wondering if I was unnecessarily rude.
I go to the gym pretty regularly and usually treat it as “me time.” I put my headphones on, focus on my workout, and try not to get distracted.
In the middle of one of my sets, this girl next to me tried to start a conversation. I had my headphones in and was clearly mid-workout, but she kept trying to talk. I pulled one earbud out and she started asking the usual gym small talk stuff like how many sets I had left, how long I’d been training, etc.
I answered briefly but then put my headphone back in because I wanted to continue my set.
A few minutes later, she tried again. This time I just nodded and kept working out without really engaging. I didn’t want to be rude, but I also didn’t want to have a conversation in the middle of my workout.
Eventually she stopped trying, but when she walked away she said something like “guess people don’t talk anymore.”
Now I feel a bit weird about it. AITA for now talking back to her??
NTA. She was the rude one.
I hate being interrupted when I’m working out.
NTA. Headphones in at the gym is a universal code.
24 minutes ago: how to talk to women
14 minutes ago: aita for ignoring a woman trying to talk to me
YTA.
This is the right answer. OP asked how to talk to women, and then the perfect opportunity presented itself with no effort on OP’s part whatsoever, and he didn’t take it! Are you kidding me??
This may come as a shock, but the first step to talking to women actually happens to be replying to her when she talks to you.
Good catch. Guess OP is making up BS
This reminds me of the day I was reading a book on how to make friends and kept getting annoyed when people interrupted me. Lol
NTA
I firmly believe that just because someone wants to strike up conversation doesn’t make you obligated to participate.
The gym is not a coffee klatsch.
NTA. She needs to learn how to read the room whether it’s the gym or elsewhere – headphones or earbuds indicate “sorry, my ears are busy listening to other things”
NTA – you don’t have to talk to people you don’t want to. But you can just say, “hey, I’m focused and listening to something right now. Have a great workout.”
Then you’re done
Same for women. Idk why people don’t use their words
NTA. I hate when people say things like that. “Guess people don’t talk anymore.” No, I just don’t want to have a full conversation on your timeline when I am in the middle of something. You interrupted me, but I am the rude one?
You were there to workout. You had headphones in/on. You answered her questions without being rude but without elaboration. These are all signs that you do not wish to engage in casual conversation or small talk. She eventually got the hint.
NTA. She was a creep. If this scenario had been the other way round that is certainly what you would be called.
NTA, headphones are the universal “do not disturb” sign for a reason.
NTA.
Women regularly ignore or are curt to men hitting on them at the gym who do exactly this. They come up to us when we’re clearly working out, interrupt our sets, ignore our earbuds, and try to start a conversation. Interrupting someone mid set who has in earbuds is rude. You’re not obligated to stop your workout and entertain someone who is being rude.
Standard advice given to women in this situation (because it’s a common problem) is to wear over the ear headphones that are harder to “miss” and to simply ignore the person. If they persist in bothering you the advice escalates to alerting gym admin. This advice isn’t and shouldn’t be different just because you’re a man.
This woman may have been into you and trying to get your attention. They may be new to the gym and not yet understand the etiquette. Or they may just be rude. It doesn’t matter. They aren’t entitled to your time.