So when I go out with a certain friend, I prefer to pay separately and avoid splitting the check if at all possible. I feel like my friend usually wants to do one check to get credit card points which I’m normally okay but they’re excessive about it. Also, when we split the check its also excessive. They’ll try to calculate things down the penny (including the tax and tip)
I’m pretty laid back when I go out with most people because usually my mental math is pretty close. I might be a little off (+/- $5 at most for big checks) so it water under the bridge for everyone else. Anyway, I feel like with this person its annoying because you’re getting your points already so you’re making money essentially (I’m helping you keep your status) and if its close enough then it doesn’t matter. We’ve gone out enough and I round up so if I’m a little under once or twice then it balances out over time.
Its almost getting to the point where I kinda don’t want to go out with them anymore because something that shouldn’t be a big deal is kinda a big deal. I could have the conversation with them but I’d rather just split the bill upfront if I can to mitigate any potential issues
NTA just ask for a separate check when you are ordering.
Start the conversation with a question about how they calculated their portion. I don’t know why the credit card points bother you. Do you care about points? Maybe she has a special expense she plans to use the points for?
NTA You’re supposed to be friends. Counting down to the penny is ridiculous. Just say you want separate checks.
Also, I’m a little petty. I wouldn’t want someone so annoying to get those credit card points from my purchase.
There is no conversation other than saying I’m paying separately
NTA… but your man gripe is that they put it on their card and tell you exactly what you owe?
They aren’t overcharging you? They aren’t saying let’s just split it even though they ordered more expensive items? If that’s true, it seems a little petty on your part.
However, you are still NTA for just wanting a separate check. If you want to avoid drama come up with a line like “oh my card will give me points too now so I prefer to use my card from now on for my stuff.”
I understand your approach to it’s not that serious / it will balance out, and I think that is common / normal. Asking for a split check up front is smart and eases your stress about dealing with this friend and is a good move.
NAH. If you want to pay separately then do so but complaining that they want to be accurate isn’t fair. There is nothing wrong with making sure you’re paying your fair share. I also dint want you paying extra for me. I also promise you they you’re contribution to their points is negligible.
NAH but I don’t really understand the problem. Someone else pays for everything, gives you a specific number you owe… and the struggle is adding a decimal point and 2 more numbers on the venmo you would have to send anyway to someone else?
Get a separate check, whatever, but this is a weird issue to have. If it was someone saying, “I’ll pay you back” or “Can you cover for me” and then never paying you back – *thats* an issue. This whole situation just sounds like OP wants to be in control and is angry they’re not.
NAH. Admittedly, I’m more like your friend (“Let’s figure out exactly what everyone owes”) because I feel the over/under crowd is mostly under. But separate checks solves the problem. Just tell them you are also trying to earn credit card points.
So… get a rewards card and get separate checks and say you want your points.
“It’s not that big a deal”
Ok so just let them pay with the card and you pay them the half you owe
“WOAH WOAH WOAH!!! 🖐🏻😡 I wanna split the check!!”
YTA for being the one making it a big deal but then pretending its the other person…
Yeah, I’m confused, because it definitely sounds like OP is the one making a big deal about this.
>We’ve gone out enough and I round up so if I’m a little under once or twice then it balances out over time.
Okay… but your friend is clearly not comfortable with this. Why does that not matter to you?
If your friend is willing to do the math and figure out exactly how much you owe, then what is the big deal?
>I feel like with this person its annoying because you’re getting your points already so you’re making money essentially
Yeah, but it doesn’t hurt you in any way. They’re not making money at your expense.
And if they’re your friend, shouldn’t you want to help them? Especially since it doesn’t impact you in any way?
Honestly, you say this shouldn’t be a big deal, but the only reason it’s a big deal is because *you* are making it into one. You could just let them use their card, let them calculate how much you owe, and pay them your portion. Or you could just say upfront to the server that it will be two separate checks. But I feel like YTA if you stop going out with them over this, because it should be a nonissue and you are turning it into a Whole Thing™️.
So the problem is your friend pays for the check and then charges you the exact amount you owe? YTA