I [37F] have been letting my mom [late 50sF] live with me, my husband, and our young child for 4 years. She’s always had money issues, but the past few months have been… a lot.
She’s been gambling and blowing through paychecks, asking my siblings for cash, and constantly saying she’ll “figure it out” but I dont believe she’s actually taking steps to fix anything.
This month she told me she couldn’t pay her portion of rent again. (She pays rent purely out of principle. Its not something we NEED. just a contribution to the home) After once again blowing all of her money (literally all of it. "ALL" is not an exaggeration.) That was the moment I realized I couldn’t keep carrying this. I told her firmly but still kind and supportive that she needs to plan to move out in the next two months so she can find a situation that fits her needs better.
I wasn’t cruel about it. I didn’t yell. I just stated the boundary and told her it was non negotiable.
She immediately got upset and said I was being cold and ungrateful, and that “no parent should ever have to explain themselves to their child.” She framed it like I took her problem and used it against her.
I asked her to leave because I can’t afford for her to keep being financially irresponsible. Idk who or how much she owed and she refuses to tell me. This COULD resolve itself (unlikely), but it could also get really bad and I have my own family to protect.
I gave her two months notice and even offered to help her look for resources.
My siblings say I did the right thing.
My husband is supportive.
But I still feel guilty because i knowni hurt her feelings and that wasnt my intent.
AITA for telling her she needs to move out?